Writing Untitled poem I just made

[ZakuSage]

I just woke up after a long sleep, and after getting on my computer these words are the first things the came to my head.

I tread along a winding road
Carpeted with thorns
With bushes of tainted berries
Without shoes, food, or sleep

Well thats it. It's pretty short, but I'd like to hear some critique.

[Luminous]

[font=Century Gothic][size=1][color=silver]Well... Its interesting, but for some reason, to me it seems as though its not finished.[/color][/size][/font]

[font=Century Gothic][size=1][color=#c0c0c0][/color][/size][/font]
[font=Century Gothic][size=1][color=#c0c0c0]ja ne![/color][/size][/font]
[font=Century Gothic][size=1][color=#c0c0c0]~luminous[/color][/size][/font]

[ZakuSage]

I guess thats a good point. I originally wrote 2 other stanzas, but I thought they sucked so I simplified it to 1.

Anything else?