Writing I dream't I was an Asshole [PG]

[Darker Alucard]

I Dream't i was an Asshole
Really the worst of them all
God Intended Me to Fall
To the Hell, Last Call.
So I went in the plain
In the middle of pouring rain
see my life had been so lame
and then i woke up
and my life was never the same.

This is a song-like poem

Criticize your way through.

Your Minion

Darker Alucard

[Sandy]

I'm sorry, but this whole poem was kind of lame... Poetry is something beyond words that rhyme, although it's the most basic form of it.

You should also have rhythm and some consistency in the poem, not just phrases that end in a rhyming words put together.

If I have to try to say something positive about this poem, I'd say it has a certain amusing irony in it.

Sorry if I sound too hard, but I reckon you don't place this piece among the best poems of all times either...

[Darker Alucard]

jeje i actually put it in a journal i call the bad poem compilation from Daniel Afonso (me). But i wanned to see wht ya thought about it. anyway anymore criticism would be welcome.