Wizard Phoenix

Hi all, now I'm not sure if anybody else has heard about this yet but bare with me. Right, so basically, the year is 2010 and this year is almost directly predated by a year called 2012. I say 'almost', because the year after this one is [i]actually[/i] 2011, but after that is 2012 (it is essentially a basic progression of linear time in case anybody is confused). Now that we've got the hard bit out of the way, let me tell you a little something about this important new era. 2012 is going to see a huge transformation for mankind, there is going to be a global shift. For too long mankind has fought its pointless wars with its expensive jets, guns and atomic bombs. In 2012, we as a species will experience a new era and our species is going to remember who we REALLY are. No longer will we wage our pointless wars against our fellow men. Our wars will have purpose for we will remember what it is to fight as noble warriors! To fight for king and country!! Yes, in case you had not already guessed, the return of the ork is imminent!! For years now they have been accumulating in their mountain lairs, building up armies of gargantuan proportions! and I'm not going to deny that their might be hob-goblins and dragons as well. BUT FEAR NOT! For we are Elven kind!! This is who we really are. And the time must come when we can unite and fight as true warriors and saucarers!! Our time is now fellow countrymen!

An ork is not an elf and a goblin is not a unicorn!

I still remember the day I won. It was a frosty Tuesday evening, sundown, one cold October many moons ago. As I traversed the dark dusty path in front of me, the forest became a dark engulfing presence, its sinister manifestation looming in front of me. I'd been travelling for a few days now and water was getting low. I drew my hip flask and drank the watery liquid substance inside. Glug Glug. Refreshing. Glug Glug Glug Glug. My spirits now lifted, I exhaled. Pffffff I said out loud. It was then that I entered the forest. As I followed the trail of twigs and leaves into the forest I was surrounded, also by twigs and leaves. But not only twigs and leaves. Though that I did not yet knoweth. Apart from trees, birds and cats (which I’d seen). Not just any birds though, ravens. A dark omen to even the most amateur of adventurers. The sun twinkled briefly through the dark cold of the night. As I continued through the forest, listening to bird song and thinking about caterpillars, one of my favourite animals, I thought I could hear cheerfull people singing in the distance. Silly me I thought to myself. Because it was then that I encountered the orks. As is a common fact orks simply love to rifle through your pockets, looking for bags of gold which they can then steal, often then chopping you into pieces and throwing you into a cauldron pot as they count their swagger and talk about different ways they are going to cook you for dinner!! And there is very little you can do when orks have you tied up with ropes, believe you me. ...unless of course your presence also alerted a merry band of elves!! Elves are sworn enemies of the orks and are all too happy to run in, swords slicing as they disable each and every ork in the area! Which they did! Hoorah!!! We all cheered at the dismembered orks! It was then that I found we were not far from the magical elven homeland, which I know you all know and love, called Elfwood. Since those times I’ve always been friends with the elves. [COLOR=black]And you won't be surprised to know that I DID in fact hear singing in the forest that cold Tuesday in November. It was merry wood elves having one of their many enchanted woodland feasts!![/COLOR]

[quote name='ChibiHorsewoman'](Nazareth Hall)[/QUOTE] The Nazareths have their own halls at schools now?? Interesting. The Nazareth are very set in their ways, having very strong opinions, some of which people might even consider to be wrong. After all, would it be right to force these ideologies into children? It seems like a very dangerous situation to me and believe you me, I'd know. So, just who are The Nazareth?? The Nazareth are first and foremost, the nine. Once men who succumbed to dark powers, they have been doomed to roam the Earth in limbo, creating an eery presence wherever their curious errands may take them. While they also have horses, that DOESN'T mean that everyone with a horse is a ring wraith!! This means that should you bump into anybody with a horse you should NOT (I repeat, NOT) necessarily attack them. The best way to deal with a ring wraith is actually to run away as fast as you can, potentially incorporating evasive forward rolls and cartwheels into your escape routine.

For a few years now I have been observing St. Patricks Day, an odd occasion indeed - and one not much observed in forby times. Every year St. Patricks Eve I see the streets full to the brim of leprechauns - the sons of cobblers with a keen eye for fixing shoes, I see them getting merry on magic potions and dancing irish jigs into the dusk!! Now, yes we have relatives of the fairies causing mischief and drinking potions, with their magic green hats and pots of gold. That I know we can all agree, much makes sense. leprechauns bloody well love treasure for gods sake. It's the damn demographics that don't add up. These places often have less than 1% of cobblers yet the streets are rife with leprechauns. If they can't cobble shoes, then we all know that they'll soon get sick of guarding pots of gold at rainbows ( and one end of a rainbow often points into a dragons lair)