Writing Vampyre

[Iron Otaku]

Down among the lepers and the lunatics,
I have seen the truth, I would show it to
you, but it would only drive you mad.
Only I am strong enough to bear this knowledge
without fear. As you can see, what I
have learned has not affected me in the
slightest. My eyes? A mere trifle; it usually
takes a few days for the bleeding to stop,
each time I pluck them anew
:demon: :naughty: :devil: :mad:

[Iron Otaku]

(Yes, I know they are identical, but it is time everyone knew where I was coming from. I took this quote from VAMPIRE: THE MASQUERADE. Its a nice game to play... Better than Dungeons&Dragons... so try it sometime.
Thank you for not pointing out the obvious.)

[Guest Shift]

[color=royalblue][b]Hmm... I like it.[/color][/b]

[Spikey]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=darkblue]It's really good, but you need to seperate your lines better. For instance:

As I walk,
Through the deep deep valley,
I hear a sound,
But so sound, it can't be found.

Something like that. The poem is real nice, although the lines do need to be seperated. If you were trying to make a poem like this:

Cralling
Cralling in a deep valley
Something I don't know
But I know how to
Just let your hands go
Fall into the wind.

Like that. But the poem is really nice, just separate your lines.[/size][/color]

[Raiha]

[COLOR=seagreen]Thanks for pointing that out Spikey, saves me the trouble.[/COLOR]

[Spikey]

[COLOR=royalblue]Ahh.. no problem. I love poetry. I study it everyday.[/color]

[Iron Otaku]

Hey, it isn't exactly a poem, but more of a quote. I will gather my Poetry and post it all under another thread.

[Raiha]

[COLOR=seagreen]Try Today's Poem thread. It's what it's there for.[/COLOR]

[Flipmodesquad]

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