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Writing My poems.


Vicky
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[SIZE=1]Just before you read on, please I beg you to be gental. I've just about had it with all the criticism. So please, no more. I [B]DID[/B] put effort into these. Some people think there amazing, but what do you think?

[I]
Believe:


You can do anything in life if you believe;
you can do anything,
Just go out there and try,
And look at what you'll receive.

Any thing is possible,
just believe,
Life isn't all that low,
so go out there and achieve the impossible.

Everything is great,
when you achieve things,
Life is amazing,
There's no need for hate.

If you just look,
and see what's there,
you'll go on with it,
Take that huge step that others have took.

So do you believe?
That you can do anything?
Please take me for my word;
you can do anything,
if you Believe.

Why?

They left me in the yard,
I thought they loved me,
until that cat came and ruined their love for me.

I now live on the streets;
I want them back,
Why did they leave me?
Why me? I can't survive on the streets...
Why did it happen to me?

I need a friend...
another puppy maybe,
will you not turn away?
will you be my friend?

How did it come to this?
I was once the top pet,
and now I'm on the streets,
Why does it come to this?

Please don't turn away,
Don't do what they did,
please don't turn away,
That's all I have to say...


My name:


My life began on a winter night,
I have a life of glory and pride,
My life is perfect,
My life is bright.

I'm a man of pride,
I carry only one name,
I'm so full of myself,
I've got nothing to hide.

I am strong enough for one name,
A name of power,
Glory and pride,
But life's still the same.

I live on my mind,
I trust it in every way,
That's way I have this name,
But that's not the way of my kind.

I go by this one name,
I'll tell you this once,
Don't judge me,
before you know me,
because I led the werewolves,
And I go by the name,

Dango wolf.



You can never Defeat me.

Try, as you like,
You can?t defeat me.
I?m like an immortal,
I can go to the top and make this hike.

You?re no match for me,
In mind and strength,
I?m just the best,
You?ll see.

Are you ready to take me on?
You?re facing the master,
Are you sure?
Then my power will be shone.

You?re no match for me,
You shouldn?t have come,
This was too much,
Just go, just go and flee.

You?re hopeless,
Why face me?
I never lose,
I always win.


Black Beauty.


Can you see her beauty?
That heart full of love?
Well what do you expect?
For Black Beauty.

She is amazing,
Calm and wonderful,
A horse of Light,
This is amazing.

I wish I was her,
To be free,
To glare all day long,
And not a care for humans.



Twinkle in the dark night.


The dark night has a hold over me,
I can?t take my eyes of its darkness,
I?m being sucked in,
Darkness is all I can see.

There?s no hope for me when it?s dark,
I just sit and stare,
I can?t take my eyes off that dark field,
I just sit there in the park.

I don?t know what to do,
If I sit here much longer,
I?ll die,
Why does it have a hold over me? Why not you?

There?s no hope for me,
There?s no hope when I?m here,
Expect,
That twinkle I can see.

There?s something out there,
That let?s me go,
A twinkle so small and powerful,
Released me from the night air.
[/SIZE] [/I]
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[size=1] Well, at least you have correct punctuation for once. That's great...either you actually used spell check, or you've improve a lot. Who knows.

As for criticism...if you don't want it, then why post the poems? Exactly.

I am not meaning to be mean when I crticize, but, I am merely trying to guide you as a writer and make you see things you'd not see alone. Such is a growing process, a change: you take in other's opinions and weigh them on yours.

As for your poems, I enjoyed the "Black Beauty" one the most. The first and second seemed too optimistic and too self-righteous for my tastes.

I am a cynical person, you know...so yeah. But they are very good, considering what else I've seen from you. So yes.

I like more dark stuff, I will admit though. But these things...are innocent nothings which are so painted as flowers. Heh.

So yes. Keep writing, definitely. You have some talent...and this is just the tip of the iceberg, I'd say.[/size]
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[SIZE=1][I] I did it on word. The spell check didn't come up alot, it came up when my hand slips.

I think I have improved on my spelling, and I started writing alot of stories...ALOT. To many...but my favourite one is...

[B] Annihilation[/B]

It's almost finished, and it's very long. [/SIZE][/I]
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