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Writing [Song] Struggle For Escape [G - Minor suggestive themes]


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[COLOR=DarkSlateBlue][B]Struggle For Escape[/B]

And when a new day dons
But your still tied to your old laws
But you still wake up and
Nothing is what you wish that it could be
And when a new light shines
But you draw the blinds
Nothing is what you want to see

(Verse 1)
Another day when the thing you love's so far away
Another time when you wish it would all go away
And yet you cannot leave the things tying you to this Earth
Screaming if only
I could break these chains

And then you see the way
But it's too far from your reach


(Verse 2)
Another day when you're bullets seem to miss the mark
Another time when the world around you feels so dark
And yet you can't escape the people who've kept you alive
Screaming if only
I could live this way



(Verse 3)
And when the cloud's silver lining comes into view
Still determined that you'll fight for what you want to do
Still remembering that there's something worth fighting for
As soon as you escape this life, just open up your door

(Chorus X2)[/COLOR]
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[color=#b0000b][size=1][i]When a new day [b]dawns[/b]. You also used the wrong "your" there once or twice.

[i]And yet you cannot leave the things tying you to this Earth[/i]. This line throws me a bit. The use of "Earth" is a little strange, especially since it's assumed that everything is taking place on earth. That you mention Earth, especially with a capital letter, seems to imply that you're looking at things in an astronomical sense--other planets are options. I don't think that's what you are trying to say, because it doesn't come through anywhere else in the song. "...this world" might be an alternative.

Anyway, other than that I haven't got any complaints or suggestions.[/color][/size]
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