Writing New to poetry (my work included)

[desertphoenix]

[FONT="Verdana"][COLOR="DarkRed"]I need to find a new hobby, and I thought I would give poetry a try. So far I could only write one poem over whatever solid period of time it's been. Like most things I've tried, I'm probably way off in some areas I bluntly missed. So below is my first real attempt at a poem. Criticism and advice is very welcomed.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[U][B]My Desert[/B][/U]
Through the sands time?s forgot
I wonder how it will end
Who I am is all I brought
What I have I must defend

Which way to wander?
No clear signs to be read
No guide to ponder
A path; no beaten thread

Many faces and yet barren
Never wondered how I?m here
What is this place I must lay in?
Why do I still sleep in fear?

This is my desert, and this is my home
No sand, no tundra, but I?m all alone

[Botar]

It's good, but I will tell you what helps; try looking at lyrics by bands you really like, thats what helps me write poems. But it's not bad, not bad.:box:

Edit- Oh, i'm not good at heavy critisism, i'm just not mean enough, thats why I just said it was good, i'll let someone else citique it, I just give advice!

[Drizzt Do'urden]

There are so many types of poems, how you write yours is really up to you. The rhyming scheme you're using is good, and if it works for you that's great.

But remember a good poem doesn't have to rhyme like that, though I'm not taking away from yours. Heck my first, and only, hack at poetry is what you see in my sig. I followed the same way you did, but the best poetry I've read follows different schemes. I can't give you advice other then to look at other poets poems and find your "niche".

But that's what's great about poetry, you're never [I]really[/I] wrong. Whatever you find and enjoy is right by you.

I enjoyed reading it

[desertphoenix]

[FONT="Verdana"][COLOR="DarkRed"]Thank you both for your advice. I still have a few ideas of what I want to write, but am still working to get them across. Looking at more types of poems is a good idea I probably should start right away. I just have a fear of being tempted of using someone else?s work. So, I just feel guilty when I read other people?s poems I guess, but I can get over this pretty easily. Hopefully I will find at least one style or scheme that truly suites me no time soon, or just make one to call my own.

I think I have to also get over some of my writing feeling forced to me. So far the only thing new I got is a short poem about a pirate. I?m not completely happy about how it turned out, but I?ll post it anyway.[/COLOR][/FONT]
[U][B]
Untitled[/B][/U]
wine, gin, scotch, and brandy
They all will come in handy
All of it pillaged and bought
For dining time, they are not
Oh crap the rum is sandy