Dragon Warrior Posted June 27, 2002 Share Posted June 27, 2002 Another goofy story by yours truely. This chapter book, I'll actually finish. Yes, it's comedy. Enjoy: [SIZE=4][B]The[/B] [/SIZE] [SIZE=4][B]Bizarre-Tasting[/B] [/SIZE] [SIZE=4][B]Ice Cream[/B] [/SIZE] [SIZE=4][B]Incident[/B] [/SIZE] By the greatest author ever: Stephen King Wait... sorry. The correct name is: Gavin Brown [SIZE=4][B]Prologue[/B] [/SIZE] As we all know, the world is filled with haness crimes and odd incidents. But what we are not aware of is the uncanny happenings of the jungle apes. These mammals said to had morphed into the smarter, and let?s just say more handsome, species known as us Humans. The apes of today consist of smarter creatures than the ones of the past making people believe they?ll stop thinking paper is a certain food group. I know I will never stop thinking that. Mmm? paper. Delish! But as we think of the apes as stupid creatures, they think of us as smart and handsome beings. Umm? so what if that?s not true, but apes will rule the world soon enough. You?ve seen Planet of the Apes. The Statue of Liberty, man! For God sakes! It was Earth! IT WAS EARTH! Umm? but enough about the monkeys. Our story is about ice cream. And murder. But mostly ice cream. And who would have thought a craving for spinach and mushroom-flavored ice cream could get a guy in so much trouble that he could be serving himself trouble for dinner? What? That?s the quickest metaphor I could think of. So sue me! Not literally. But as for the ice cream and murder, an innocent bystander was accused of doing the job. That?s right. He was wrongfully accused. But that?s not all. He didn?t enjoy the spinach and mushroom-flavored ice cream that he had a craving for so much. So in the end, it wasn?t worth it. Of course, who in the right mind would want to eat spinach and mushroom-flavored ice cream. What?s this man thinking? Why doesn?t he act normal and eat real ice cream like paper-flavored. Mmm? paper flavored. But who are we to poke fun at a man?s favorite ice cream? Everyone has a favorite. Like me and my paper flavored. God that?s good paper. But as we all know, this man didn?t do the crime. And that?s what this whole book is about. I know what your thinking. Why waste a book on this sorry sap?s life when you could be writing a book on sword fights, wars, magic, or a Star Wars getup. But nooo. The author, which is the best author ever might I add, has to be stubborn and chose to right a book about some guy and his ice cream. I don?t know what?s wrong with this author. And how did I become the narrator? I didn?t ask for the job. It just came to me. Pretty disappointing. This author, I tell you, he must have been drinking too much soda when he was writing this because I mean really, who would read this stuff? You people reading. You must be chained down, locked up, brain washed or something ?cause it hurts me just to narrate this story. There?s no end to the torture, I tell you what. I might as well start reading the story and get it over with. Even though you may end up painfully listening to this great author?s writing. So hang onto your straps that tie you down and get reading for a terrible story written by an awesome author. Yeah right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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