Flipmodesquad Posted July 15, 2002 Posted July 15, 2002 How could you turn away Always forever you used to say Forever those words are in my heart Now they are nothing but words of stone You left me out in the cold For someone who you said was more dear why did you turn away A love forever That will stay :bawl: :bawl: :bawl: :bawl: :bawl: :bawl: :bawl: :bawl: :bawl: IF ITS TERRIBLE PLEASE TELL ME NOW AND CORRECT ME.
Ninjaman Posted July 15, 2002 Posted July 15, 2002 Wow, very beautiful. Very good! And you're asking for corrections? It doesn't need any, in my opiion.
Mist Posted July 20, 2002 Posted July 20, 2002 [color=red][size=1] Good...although it was a bit short. You were very repetitive with the word "forever", which sorta threw it (the poem) off. You also would have been better off with stanzas. Still very good job, though! 7/10[/color][/size]
Krademon Posted July 20, 2002 Posted July 20, 2002 Ahh, memories of love are the most sacred. Or am I just blabbing? It was very good. I agree with Mist on the forever bit but I quite enjoy short poetry (Stuff shakespear). Very good!
vegeta rocker Posted July 20, 2002 Posted July 20, 2002 i like just repetitive but i do that too so we can be repetitive pals.
Mist Posted July 21, 2002 Posted July 21, 2002 [color=red][size=1] It's okay to be repetitive; I never said it was a bad thing. It's just the word "forever", which is supposed to have distinct meaning, was over-used, and sorta threw it off. Nothing more.[/color][/size]
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