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Angelic Wings


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To fly on one?s own wings is a dream we all have. Once upon a time, I believed I was put here on this world to bring smiles to people?s faces. Many years have passed since then, and now I am torn between what I once thought, and my present beliefs. Am I here to hurt others? To do so eternally even without meaning to? Am I destined to forever throw knives into the hearts of the ones I care for?



Eternity is not something I?ve really thought about. I know all that is born dies. That is the unalterable truth. Life ends, but the pain and sorrows of the past are something that can?t be erased with the coming of death. I know this, better than most realize, due to the fact that I pretend to be shallow and upbeat most of the time. Even when I'm cying, the world only sees a smile. It?s not hard to fake one.



And then, there is the matter of the heart. It?s fragile, illogical, and yet, is the biggest part of what makes us human. For me, to show you want to care about me, is that you cause me to fall for you. And then, when it?s all over, you hate yourself, and your heart begins to chill, and then to freeze. But a frozen heart no longer has the ability to fly on its own angelic wings. Ironic, isn?t it? It?s crazy, irrelevant, and yet a part of humanity. But perhaps that is what makes us human. The ability to love, and to feel heartache, is that really so unique?

Human, to be human, to FEEL human, what does that mean, really? In essence, to be able to ask one?s self those questions is the answer. But seldom is that a satisfying answer to anyone. Kind of depressing, to know that. Humans are ridiculous, that is the never-ending, unbending unaltered truth. And It?s so bleak, people often refuse to even contemplate such things. But still, even I don?t want to accept this. It?s almost painful. By by knowing this to bethe truth, to understand it, isn't that accepting it?


And yet, even though this is the truth, humans are not without their merit. The humans species is a dying race, loaded ever more with degenerates and idiots. However, humans are capable of showing such compassion, and generosity. Human kind is not yet without hope.



To fly on your wings, is to be free. Untamable, wild, and passionate. That was how I saw myself. But, I still long to feel someone next to me, the warmth of that person letting me know that someone is there for me. I think most people feel this way. And I can?t admit it to anyone. Does that make me foolish? Does that make anyone foolish? No, I don't beleive so.


I often wonder if it because of this that I can't seem to fly on my own wings, that I need someone to help me through it....to help me fly on my own angelic wings....
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Though I shouldn't comment, I figured since it's going to be moved I'd enjoy the ride to the appropriate forum. I had to read this a second time through, nicely done Inuyasha.

Though I'm not sure where it stemed from, or what in your life happened, you've seemed to give it a positive spin.

If this is something you do normally, you should think about posting them here...well where they go..I think people would be interesed inreading more from you.
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  • 3 weeks later...

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