Empathy Posted June 5, 2002 Posted June 5, 2002 I wrote this during french class and I'm on my lunch now...so I don't have time to make an attachment...hope that's ok... Once Again Once again,I feel like I'm struck across the face, Its times like these I most hate the human race. I always feel like I'm not good for anyone. I'm forever looking at the moon,but never at the sun. Once again, I fall down really hard, Disapointment is life's only card. What can I do? Who am I and where? I'm lost and broken, but no one really cares. Once again, I think I'm lost for good. I try to untangle myself, I did the best I could. I've trie, I keep trying, but for how long? I stay there and wait, while trying to stand strong. Once again, people see only a mask, The cold hard me, my shell, my cask. No one understands that I'm different at the core, Lying there in pait I wait...still and sore...
Raiha Posted June 5, 2002 Posted June 5, 2002 [COLOR=seagreen]Fascinating. The rhyming throws off the whole poem, but not in a bad way.[/COLOR]
Empathy Posted June 6, 2002 Author Posted June 6, 2002 yeah...the rhyming sucks...but I'm not so good at poetry yet...I'll add more...I never seem to pay attention in French class...
Sui Generis Posted June 6, 2002 Posted June 6, 2002 Actually I really like it! And the different style of rhyming makes it cool! :whoops: I think its great keep up the good work!
Empathy Posted June 6, 2002 Author Posted June 6, 2002 Thanks Bry...^^I really got to start paying attention in french though...exams are coming up...SOMEBODY pity me...PLEASE....life's not fair... *grins* ok..I'm exagerating..I got it pretty good...but that don't mean I'm looking forward to exams...
Sui Generis Posted June 6, 2002 Posted June 6, 2002 You sound like me in Spanish. I just write the whole time, and never pay attention yet I ace the tests..hehe...oh wait thats a used to. Cuz I'm outta school and you arn't!!! :p Well anyawyz you are a great writer keep it up! P.S. Get on MSN
Mist Posted June 6, 2002 Posted June 6, 2002 Wow, that's really good. It's way different from anything I've seen.
Empathy Posted June 6, 2002 Author Posted June 6, 2002 what do you mean its different from anything you've ever read? *is curious*
Mist Posted June 6, 2002 Posted June 6, 2002 I meant that it is unique. You tell the truth of life how it is, and you tell it profoundly. I like that kinda stuff; you were very staright-forward. I like it a lot! ^.~
Empathy Posted June 7, 2002 Author Posted June 7, 2002 thanks...I'm glad you feel that way...I just hope everyone's life isn't as pathetic...or as sorrowful as this...
Mist Posted June 7, 2002 Posted June 7, 2002 Sorry, but you just met a person's who's life is just as pathetic...
Empathy Posted June 7, 2002 Author Posted June 7, 2002 Nice to meet you and join the club...^^but I guess I got it better than most...what's so bad about your life anyway? Just Curious
Raiha Posted June 8, 2002 Posted June 8, 2002 [COLOR=seagreen]LOL, so sorry, I wasn't insulting your ablilties to rhyme. I was actually telling you: "good job." I suppose you have to read betgween the lines.[/COLOR]
Empathy Posted June 8, 2002 Author Posted June 8, 2002 no problem...no offense taken...I already know its a crappy poem...I should have been paying attention in french class...^_^;;;
Mist Posted June 11, 2002 Posted June 11, 2002 Hmmm... French or Poetry...POETRY, duh! Well, there's lots wrong with my life. I'll pm you with 'em.
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