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Anime Anime character's Answering machine greetings


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[color=hotpink]I got to thinking about this after writing my fanfic. I needed a greeting for Usagi's answering machine. Here are a few I thought up for her and other characters[/color]
[color=violet][b]Usagi/ SailorMoon[/b]-
Hi, is this thing on? Hi You've reached. Are you sure this is on? Okay, you've reached Tsukino Usagi I can't come to the phone. Ami, how do I know if this is on. Okay you've....Answering machine runs out
[b]take 2[/b] Hi, you've reached Tsukino Usagi, I can't get to the phone, I tripped over my hair. Leave a message and I'll get back to you when I can.
This is Usagi's machine, I don't feel like talking to you right now. Leave a message and I'll get back to you when I feel like it.

[b]InuYasha[/b] *Answering machine picks up* Hi, you've reached Inuyasha. *inuyasha eats the machine*[/color]
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[color=chocolate][size=1]Usagi's is good, but agreeing with DevilishAngel, Inuyasha's could use more to it. Here, I made a different one:

This is Inuyasha. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm:
a) Eating ramen
b) Sleeping peacefully
c) On the toilet
d) I don't wanna ********** talk to you right now.

So leave a freaking message after the beep. *long beep here*[/color][/size]
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Guest MetalSonic700
Kenshin- oro? I am not here because this contraption is to confusing to answer.
Samus Aran- *breathes heavily* KILLING ALIENS! LEAVE MESSAGE!
Inuyasha- WHat the Hell is this thing *beeeeeeeeeeeep beep beep* ITS A CURSE!
Uncle (Jackie Chan)- AIIYAAA!!! BLACK MAGIC!
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Here's something I think the crew from Cowboy Bebop would say

Spike-"Yo what's going on. I'm not here right now, probably because I'm dead. Cya."

Faye-"Hey, I'm not at the phone right now, which means I probably don't like you so leave me alone to my gambling."

Jet-"Ehh? Ain't at the phone now, probably cause we're chasin another bounty head right now. *sighs*, I'm gettin too old for this. You know what to do.

Ed-"Ohhh. Exploration, Experimentation, Exploration, Explanation! *Starts laughing*. This is Ed and I'm not here right now, so leave a message, or not! *Starts laughing again*. Come here Ein! *Sound of a dog yelping*

(P.S. Ed's was hard, because she's so unpredictable.)
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Ran Fujimiya (everyone's favorite Weiss Kreuzer): Leave after the beep, don't bother with your message.
Hotohori (Fushigi Yuugi): You have the pleasure of leaving a message for the most beautiful person on Earth, man I love me...
Pikachu: Pika pika chu pika chu chu pika.
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LOL, you asked for it. . .since Cowboy Bebop was represented, I'm here with answering messages for Trigun characters.

Vash: I'm kinda busy, but if you're that pretty lady I saw earlier-*sounds of explosions, gunfire, and running*-Sorry! I have to go now!

Meryl: I'm working right now. If you absolutely *must* interrupt me, leave a message at the beep and I will respond with a bonk on your stupid spiky head as soon as I can.

Milly: If you're my big big sister, press 1. If you're my big brother, press two. If you're my little big brother, press 3. If you're my little big sister press 4. If you're Mr. Wolfwood, you know what to. . .ah, never mind! If you're Meryl, I'm really really working, honest! If you have pudding, leave it at the door, not the beep. . .

Knives: Spider. You think my time is worth your words? Do not pollute my answering machine with your babble.

Wolfwood: Bleep. Hey, it's not supposed to beep now-whaddaya mean a censor? Bleep. Oh, just forget it. Leave your bleep message at the bleep-I MEAN THE "BEEP!" BLEEP!

Legato: As I am most likely currently occupied in an act of genocide to serve the Master, I am not able to waste my time to answer this phone. Why do we filthy humans need telephones anyway?

Midvalley: Leave your message at the tone, my friend. That is, if you're still alive after hearin' my sweet music. If you got any brains at all, you'll hang up before the tone, [I]capische[/I]?
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I have a few.

[*]"Uh....can't talk...eating ramen. So.....get LOST!!!!"

[*]"Hi this is Kagome. I'm not home so please leave a messag.....Inuyasha SIT! (BOOM) Opps."

[*]"Hello, I Miroku am not available to bear your child, but please leave a message."

[*]"Hi, I'm Shippo. I'm not here; leave a....uh...Kagome, what else do I say?"

[B]Fruits Basket[/B] :
[*]"That's it rat boy. Your @## is mine. You're going down.....Oh this is Kyo. Call back later"

[*]"Hello, this is Yuki;(punch) I'm not available right now (punch) cause I'm in a middle of stupid cat fight. (punches two more times) Please leave a message."

[*]"Highschool girls....highschool girls....I'm going to see some....oh..Shagure speaking; please leave a message and...OH SHOOT!!!"

That's all; though I have more, but I forgot them. :sleep: OOH; too tired!!!!!:sleep: :sleep:
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[i][color=lightpink]Ahh Fujimaya yours is so funny!! Aya is a man with not much to say. ^^ Here's mine from Weiss Kreuz...*evil grin*

[b]-Yohji-[/b] 'Ohayo minna-san. This is the machine of Yohji Kudou. If you a pretty lady please leave me your number...Ciao" *BEEP*

[b]-Ken-[/b] Im at soccer practice or out doing stuff. Just leave a stupid message and I might get back to you. *BEEP*

[b]-Brad Crawford-[/b] Mr. Takatori called me in...d*mn butt plug. Well dont leave a long message. *BEEP*

[b]-Schuldig-[/b] If this is Yotan (AKA Yohji) calling please leave me a message...now if you are NOT him. Don't bother calling here again! *BEEP*

[b]-Farfarello-[/b] God cries when you hurt his angels. *BEEP*

[b]-Nagi-[/b] I love you Tot! *BEEP*

ya I know...dumb as usual. Well I hope you like them.[/color][/i]
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hehe, this thread is cool :)

Alucard (Hellsing): *demonic laughter* you filthy trash think you have the right to speak to me, a true vampire? I shall enjoy watching your death, PUNK!! *more demonic laughter*

Kirika Yumura (Noir): if you'd like, you can leave a message for me at the beep....but who am i? do you know?
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Here are some more Cowboy Bebop ones

Vicious: (very deep voice) This is Vicious. Leave your last message because you're about to be dead.

Periot Le Fou: (his demonic laughter) Let's have some fun. You try hiding and I'll come and kill you! (laughter) Leave your message so I can find you!

Gren: Hey this is Gren. Leave your message and I'll try to get back to you as soon as I can. I'm probably busy right now.

Shin;(tense, panicky tone) You shouldn't have called. They're after me right now and I'll probably be dead after the beep.

Lin: This is the syndicate. What's your reason for calling me! I'm obviously not here right now so leave your message.

Ed's father: Hahahaha. I'm not here right now friend, probably makin some maps, so leave your message. Macin... whatever where are you?!

Mao Yenrai: Hello, you have reached the Yenrai mansion, please leave your message after the...(hear a throat slitting in the backround).

I'll try to think up some more. In the meantime, I'd like to compliment everyone else's messages. These are pretty hard to do :laugh:
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More Trigun-the rest of the Gung Ho Guns:

Caine the Longshot: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .*beep*

Chapel the Evergreen: Life is like an incessant series of problems, all difficult, with brutal choices, and a time limit. The worst thing you can do is to make no choice, waiting for the ideal conclusion to present itself. . .Which is what happens now. *beep* (credits to bishounen.net/trigun/write/quotes.html for the original quote)

Zazie the Beast: Leave your message at the buzz. *bzzt*

Hoppered the Gauntlet: blab blab blab, yeah, that's really good. You know, you're a big loser. All of you are big losers. You think you can out-talk me? While we're shooting each other? Uh huh, yeah right. Mmmhmm. Let's see who the better gunman is here, no? And by the way, Legato's breath stinks! I think he's getting cavities with all those swee-*beep*

Grey the Ninelives: Grr grr. *crunching sound and silence heard, it is assumed that he smashed the phone and answering machine picking it up*

Leonof the Puppetmaster: Did you really think the Gung-Ho Guns can only be called one at a time? Obviously you do not know of our telephone network. Wait for the beep. *beep*

Raidei the Blade: "Sessha wa ima rurouni kenshin wo miteoru yue denwa ni wa deraren. Goryoushou itadakitai." ("I'm sorry, but I'm watching Ruruoni Kenshin and can't answer the phone right now." Thanks to Metatron for the translation into Japanese.)


Dominique the Cyclops: If I was so inclined, I could have killed you three times before the beep. And any obscene callers-you know who you are-will die now. *beep*

Monev the Gale: In negotiations with my steroid supplier. Leave a message and I'll squash you as soon as I can.
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I salute you Milliefan. Those were the best ones yet. Really creative and humorous :D Here some more from Cowboy Bebop.

Julia: I'm not here right now and I'll probably never be. I'm on the run so you'd better find some other way to find me (gunshot heard in backround).

Annie: Damn that Spike! Oh is this thing on? It's Annie, I'm not here so leave your message and go!

Chessmaster Hex: Eh? What's going on? Anyone wanna play chess? I wonder what this does. *beep*

Decker (Woody Allen from Heavy Metal Queen): Huh? Oh, ummm, I'm not here so leave your message, that is if you want, I mean ehh no one's forcing you or anything. Anyone want explosives?

Domino Walker: Hey man! What's going on?! Now, I'd be interested in your message if you wanted some mushrooms.

Old Man Bull: I am not here right now. You meant to call Running Rock(Jet) didn't you? I know you were because I'm an indian with an answering machine.

Victoria Telpsicorei (VT); Ya, whatta ya want? I ain't here right now, so leave your message, Unless your a bounty hunter like my husband, then I've got nothing to do with you.

Thanks to [url]www.otaku.com[/url] for reminding me of the names from the series.
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  • 5 weeks later...

INUYASHA: Uhh.. Kagome, I the ?blender? is talking again! *or is it called a vaccum?*

KAGOME: If this is Hojo, I have a cough. I mean *cough noises*

MIROKU: If this is a lady, I'll be home by 5:00 for you. *other line is a fat lady saing "I'll be right over"

SHIPPO: *scream it's attacking me!

KOGA: Hi Kaagome, I know that's you. I'm comeing over now. *other line I'm only a telemarketer.


Demon Babe:) (Lil' Sis)
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those were funny okay Heres my try:
Inuyasha:Inuyasha here if your my brother press1 if your Kouga press 2 if your the tunder brothers press 3*kouga's on the other line he presses 2* STOP!F***KIN calling me! Kagome isn't here! stupid wolf!
Kouga:HI I just what to confess my love to every girl I pick up off the street leave a message and your number*Guy on the other end hangs up real quick*
Miroku:*trys to use sexy voice*Hey your a lucky lady you know that. I'm able to have YOU bare MY child at 5:30pm on saturdays leave a message and your number peace baby! *sesshemaru on the other end*Ho*e
Sesshemaru:don't call me I'm killing someone
Naroku:If I'm not here and you don't leave a message then I'm at your house killing you at this very moment*the guy on the other end*Hel-hello...this is the-the charlotte observer
yusuke:If I don't like you leave a message so I can make a note to kick your a** in the future teachers included
Hiei:Hn. I don't care so don't leave a message I already KNOW what your about to say
Kurama:can't...pickup...phone being attacked by rapid... fan girls no! no! don't cut my*sounds of screaming *
Kuwabara:how does this work again? its christmas right? should I say Hey hey or ho ho?Oh I know HEY HO!*message ends**person on the other line looks disturbed*stupid.*hangs up*
Jin:Touya! how do ya work this thang*hear lots of crashing and falling items*uh...opps
Touya:The stupid windmaster almost broke the answering machine and just about everything else in this place if it wasn't for my honor I'd leave him to trip over himself all day. any way leave a message if you have any honor
Chu:.........what a'm I doing? picking up the what?*runs out of time*
Rinku: well chu's drunk right now if you want him but if you want me then I might be playing video games so don't bother me ka
suzuki:I'm so beautiful...it's such a beautiful day so leave me a beautiful message if you don't you must positively die *light laghter**person on the other end* Okaaay
shishiwakamaru: I'm more improtant than you so just don't leave a message or call back.no really. I'm not kidding
karoe:Ken....shin,Ken...shin,is that you Ken...shin*ends*
Kenshin:hi leave a message sorry can't talk.So...Whats this thing called again?
Soto:It the devil talking through that machine! just like the camera and the train!I don't want ta speak to it!so if I leave a message who will get it?!huh, the devil thats who!
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[b]Usagi[/b]-Hi, you;ve reached Usagi's answering machine, I'm out saving the world before bedtime. Or maybe it is bedtime and I'm sleeping. Either way, leave a message with the number and I'll get back to you. -The Power Puff Girls are on the other line- "quit using our saying!
USagi's machine take 2: Hi, you've reached Usagi, I'm not in right now. If this is Mamoru-Press 1 and I might get back to you. If this is Seiya, press 2, and I'll try to get back to you. If this is Wufei from Gundam wing, press 3 or call my Cell and I [i]will[/i] get back to you. (what do you want from me, I do anime cross overs) If this is Queen Metallia. Dammit all to Hell, I killed you like fifty times already, we are not having a bowling tournement to even things out! *beep* Queen Nehelenia is calling and wants to do lunch.
[b]Queen Metallia[/b]-Hi, Metallia here, leave a message and I'll get back to you on when I can take over your body.
[b]Amazon Trio[/b] You've reached [color=deeppink]HawkEye[/color] [color=orange]TigerEye[/color] and [color=blue]FishEye[/color] [color=deeppink]If you're a cute older lady press 1[/color] [color=orange]If you're a cute younger lady press 2[/color] [color=blue]If you're a hot guy, press 3[/color] If this is Zirconia press 4 and we'll get back to you when we find pegasus. If this is pegasus, leave your number. *beep*
[b][i]Fushigi Yugi[/i][/b]
[b]Tamahome[/b] Miaka-what is this thing?
[b]Miaka[/b] It's an answering machine Tamahome.
[b]T[/b] and what do I do with it?
[b]M[/b] You talk to it and tell people to call you.
[b]T[/b] Hey, answering machine, how ya doin'? Can you get someone to call me? *beep*
[b]Naraku[/b]-Leave a message, if you don't leave a message I will suck out your brain and eat your soul! *Kagura is on the other end* Naraku-I have no soul-idiot!
[b]Shippou[/b] Yie, what is this thing again?? Hello? Why did you beep at me? Beep again. Go ahead! *answering machine beeps* Ai-ya It's possesed![/color]
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Uh.. leave a message if you like.

No, I swear, the difference between guns and doughnuts is the colesterol!! Wait.. this thing's on..?

This is the answering machine of Sesshoumaru-sama.

Chibi Subaru's actual answering machine of nine months:
Hello, this is Chibi Subaru.. Hello? Okay, I can't hear you.. sir, can you please speak into the phone? INTO the phone. No, I'm sorry sir, I still can't hear you.. um.. please, can you talk louder? I still can't hear you..
Okay, I have to admit now that you've been speaking to an answering machine. If you're not too pissed off, please leave a message.

I had such fun with that one..
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[color=indigo][size=1][font=century]MillieFan, I salute you. ^___^ That was bleeping hilarious.

Since specialization is all the rage....Shaman King messages. Why? Because I love it. don't ask questions.

[b]Yoh[/b]: "Hey, this is Yoh. How're ya' doing? I can't pick up the phone right now, because if Ana finds out I'm ditching my training... *Ana: Yoh! Where are you?!* Whoops, gotta' go..."

[b]Ana[/b]: "This is Ana, future Shaman Queen. Leave a message at the beep, unless it's Yoh, Manta or Ryu; if you've got something to tell me, run over here and tell me in person. The training will do you some good."

[b]Manta[/b]: "This is Manta. If I'm not here, I must be studying, or at cram school, or hanging with Yoh, or working for Ana, or watching kung-fu movies, or running from evil spirits, or....well, just leave the message."

[b]Amidamaru[/b]: "................................" (Oops, turns out you don't have any sixth sense, and can't hear ghosts. It's a shame too, because this message was hilarious. It really was.)

[b]Tao Ren[/b]: "I don't have time for you, you human vermin! Leave a message at the beep and stop bothering me!"

[b]Bason[/b]: "................." (That's what he says even if you do have sixth sense. Weird, huh?)

[b]Tao Jun[/b]: "I'm afraid I'm out getting my dress hemmed up again. Please leave a message."

[b]Li Bailong[/b]: "The number you have dialed was disconnected twenty years ago. Please hang up, and try your call again."

[b]Ryu[/b]: "I'm out checking some primo real estate, so leave a message...unless you're the guy about that hair gel; you can call me on my cell."[/color][/font][/size]
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[FONT=times new roman]Dragonball Z

Son Goku: Hey, you've reac- what?! I don't know how to use the phone or answering machine!! *Explodes*


Ranma 1/2

Ryouga: Hello, you've reached the Hibiki residence. I'm not even going to wonder how I found my way home, and found the time to make a recording for the answering machine; when I could be making better use of this rare opportunity that has been presented to me... Why, my parents could be somewhere in the house for once!! Anyway, leave a message at the sound of the beep.


Panda-Genma: *Holds up sign towards answering machine like the caller can see it*


Rurouni Kenshin

Kenshin Himura: Hello, this is Kenshin. That it is. I'm sort of in the middle of something right now, but for some reason I felt the need to do this. Yes I jumped forward in time to get an answering machine to bring back to Miss Kaoru's dojo, why? No one will ever know. That they won't. Anyway, if you remember, I said I was in the middle of something a little bit ago, we-*Kenshin is then run through with Saitou's sword*


Time to leave for months on end again. After popping up to make one stupid post.[/FONT]
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Bwahaha! Yu-Gi-Oh! ^^

Yugi: Hey there evryone! It's me, Yugi! I'm probably out trying to save the world from some psycho right now with the help of my dark side who used to be pharoah. Really! I am! You believe me, don't you? I'm not crazy! I swe*beeeeep*

Yugi 2: Er... Not crazy... I'm out... having pizza with my friends? Er... yeah... pizza... *beep*

Yami: Yugi, how do you work this infernal thing? Is this some kind of cruel torturous Shadow Game?! I bet Marik did this! Or Bakura! They just love frustrating me! Arrgh! *random smashing can be heard in the background along with Yugi yelling at Yami to stop* ...*beeeeeep*

Tea: Tea Gardner here. Can't come to the phone right now, so I'll give you an automated friendship speech... Friendship blah blah blah! Friendship, blah blah blah! Friendship- *beeeeeeeeeep*

Joey: Joey Wheeler, numbah one duelist extrodinaire here. Or... not here, ratha. Hmm... I'm more 'n' likely off with my buds... or at the new doughnut shop... Mmmmm... doughnuts...

Tristan: Please leave a message after the beep. Especially if you're name is Serenity... Oh, and if this happens to be Duke, LEAVE ME ALONE MAN! SERENITY'S MIIIIIIIIIIINE! *beeeeeeep*

Ryou Bakura: Hello there! This is Ryou-kun! I'm not here at the moment, but I hope you'll leave a lovely message for me after the tone. Have a nice day! *beeeeeeeeeeep*

Yami Bakura: *tapping can be heard, making it appear that Bakura is poking the machine* Ryou? Ryou! How does this thing do again? ... Hmmm... This thing is more complicated than the "VCR" thing. *more tapping* *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*

Marik: Hello? Odd voice-stealing box? Can you hear me? -Isis (in background): Marik, that's a answering machine! Baka brother!- Answering... machine? Hmmm... So, "Answering" machine, what is the meaning of life? ........................................... Stupid peice of *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*

Yami Marik: *eerie silence* Fools! I will banish you to the Shadow Realm! *evil laughter*................. *beep*

Odion: .....................................................................................*beeeeeeeeeeeeep*
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Here?s one but it's kind of long, but it's good!:)

Jaken: "sorry can't come to the, um, what is it called again my lord?"
Sesshomaru: "a phone."
Jaken: " Oh yes, that?s right."
Sesshomaru: "Jaken you'd best not mess this up... or I will have to kill you..."
Jaken: "Gulp*, of course not my lord, gulp*, sorry can't come to the
..PHONE right now we?re slaying someone or something, I hope it's that mangy half dog Inuyasha, so leave a message after the beep, so was that good enough lord Sesshomaru?"
Sesshomaru: "No..."
Jaken: "AHH!!"
Sesshomaru: "I was merely being sarcastic."
Ren (on other line): "oh that was good, *giggle*, now why was I calling, how am I on a phone even? Oh ya I've been Kid napped by Naraku, PLEASE REASCUE ME lord Sesshomaru I'm being held at....."
Machine runs out.

lol lol lol :toothy: I LOVE Sesshomaru!:love:

Hey here's another that I came up with, the only thing is that it's not anime, ok here it goes

Zim: Hello? Is this thing on?
GIR in back ground: The little light's blinking, ooh pritty light....
Zim:Um.....ya, anyway I am not HERE at the moment, I'm probly working on a nother plan to concure EARTH! I mean to concure ENGLISH! Um..STuPID EASSYS!
GIR:You can't write eassys? Oh I'm Going to tell!
Zim: NO!!! STOP GIR!!(voice starts to fade out) DON'T TELL THE TALLEST!!! THEY'LL KICK ME OUT OF THE INVASHION FOR SHORE!!!!(voice fades out)


[color=hotpink][size=1]Please do not double post, it is against the rules. Just go back and edit your original post. *QA*[/color][/size]
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