Shinmaru

[center][b]"The Diamond Sea"[/b][/center] The stars shine bright overhead. A smattering of diamonds in a sea of blue. I look over to the left. She is there beside me, laying silently on the wet grass. She looks over at me and smiles. "Isn't it beautiful? If only we could touch the stars..." "We will, someday. Just have faith."

I got a 135, so apparently I'm pretty smart. Funny, I don't feel very smart for wasting nine and a half minutes of my life on this test. :)

I'm 19 years old. I don't think that I've ever been that big of a fan of anime, at least I don't like it any more than I like most entertainment mediums (I actually prefer American cartoons, because they're more my style). I very rarely go into the anime forums, mostly because I would really not have that much to contribute to them. Play It remains my forum of choice, because I'm a huge gamer, and it's a forum where I actually know my stuff quite well :P

Hehe, well, mostly I just put the 'criminally misinterpret' bit up there just to be a bit of an ass. I don't think I've ever seen anyone misinterpret any short stories that I've written, or anything. If they did, I'd jump in and set them straight lol. Usually, I prefer to let people form their own ideas about what I write. I'm interested to see what you can pull out of your hat ^_~ As long as you aren't making some vague connection with Nazi zombie goth rockers, or something equally ridiculous, then I think that we can deal :p Anyway, I just needed a bit more encouragement to light a fire under me and continue the story. I've been working on my [i]hero[/i] post lately, so obviously this has been put on hiatus a bit. I'm not finished with the ol' [i]hero[/i] post quite yet, but I feel comfortable enough with it to put it off for now until I either finish this or until Zidargh finishes his post. So, yeah, I know where I want to go with the second part, and hopefully I'll be able to put it up soon. I'll either edit it into this post, or make a new post for it, depending on if someone posts after me. *wink* I'd say a good timetable for when I put it up be sometime this week...maybe in the Monday-Thursday range. But, who knows, I might end up blazing through it at superhuman speed, or I might end up going as slow as a tortoise with it. My guesses are usually wrong, at any rate. lol

To parrot everyone, this is a great idea. [quote][center][b]"Seven Saved the Seas"[/b][/center] It was a very curious thing. Pirates did not usually help the weak, the underprivileged, but Seven was different. He was an oddball. ?Did you see what he did?? ?Yeah, he crashed his ship into the Black Ark.? ?But he still saved us, even if he kind of screwed things up for himself.? A hero.[/quote]

[quote name='Semjaza Azazel']I don't care for sports games on average either, but if this is as far reaching as it seems, it's obviously not a good thing. It effectively kills off any real competition without them having to do anything in terms of making their games better.[/quote] Basically. To be fair, we don't know if the overall quality of EA's Madden games after this will level off, or even drop, but this is still a bit disparaging. It's a good business move for EA (for now, anyway, who's to say what will happen down the road, though?), but it doesn't seem to be very good for gamers. Sega Sports' NFL2K/ESPN series has always provided good competition for Madden, and this move just about kills any football games that Sega Sports would make in the future. Sure, they could still make football games, but they will not sell without the NFL license; at least, not in the quantities that Sega would like to see.

[quote name='Takuya']Seriously, I think you people are just pissed because your favorite games didn't win.[/quote] I can't speak for anyone else (though I'm sure that there are plenty of others who feel this way), but I don't like it, because it's yet another god awful television awards show. I watched it last year, and the quality of the show was rather terrible. I couldn't possibly care less about who won what, because the show didn't make me care - all I could think about was how lame it was. I didn't watch it this year, but from what I've heard, Spike TV has not done much different at all. Makes me glad that I chose to skip it.

[quote name='Siren']Why am I being portrayed as so damn evil?!? ~_^[/quote] He's trying to make these a bit more realistic. :D This is definitely my favorite chapter up to this point. It's consistently funny from start to finish, and I like the fight between Siren and Sciros. And we all know that Siren would've gotten a bitchslapping in Play It, because Des and I enjoy inflicting punishment on the masses. :cool:

I'm definitely in. I went to the library today, and the book wasn't there (though I was able to pick up a swank copy of [i]Catch-22[/i], w00t), but I put in a request for it. The book hasn't been on any sort of student reading list that I've seen, so I'm pretty certain that a copy of the book will be there for me when I go back to the library next Tuesday. Anyway, I've never really been a part of a book club, so I don't have many ideas on how it would be best to run things, or anything. My mom has some good experience with these things, though, so she could probably offer up some good advice. *shrug* Even though I'd feel like a giant nerd asking my mom for advice for a book club, but I'm already a giant nerd, so hey. EDIT: I'm a fairly quick reader, especially when I'm reading a book of my own accord, so whatever time table everyone is comfortable with is fine with me. Arcadia's two-week suggestion seems pretty reasonable for now. Maybe once everyone gets back into the swing of things with school, the timetable can be tinkered with a bit.

[quote name='ThatOneOddDude']An FPS--RPG woud be a great idea! I totally support that idea.[/quote] Don't the Deus Ex games present something along those lines? I'm pretty sure that a lot of people described Deus Ex as having some sort of medium between FPS and RPG, what with the stat building and whatnot. I'm pretty sure that there are a few games on the PC that have used that idea before, too. As for the topic, well, when someone makes a game that can top The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past as my favorite game of all time, then I'm pretty certain that I'll be able to name that the perfect game. LttP is as close to perfection that I've played.

I've played and enjoyed both Metal Gear Solid and Metal Gear Solid 2. I don't really understand the hate that MGS2 gets, really. I guess it's the same kind of hate that something like FFVIII gets - it was really experimental, and a lot of people felt that the experimentation didn't pay off. I guess I could see that, though I liked a lot of what MGS2 presented. There were really annoying bits scattered with the good stuff, though, I have to admit. I'd love to be able to play MGS3. I'm hoping that there will be an XBox port eventually, because I'm a bit lacking in money to be able to buy a PS2 and MGS3. Just about everything I've heard about the game is very positive, and I'm sure that I'd love the experience.

[QUOTE=Siren]I'd say it's a bit of both. The movie is trying to portray most of those people as totally incompetent and/or hopelessly, tragically, moronically dense, what with the Gourd vs Shoe sequence, the Verb Conjugation, the Hermit, the PFJ and the JPF, "blessed are the cheesemakers," the cross-dressing stoners (lol)...so I think a case can be made that the reasoning behind the lisps was to further enhance the ineptitude. But one can't deny that those wacky Pythonians were...well, wacky, so I'm sure "just for the hell of it" had something to do with it, too. So, yeah. I'd say a bit of both. I'm particularly fond of the "I want to be one...I want to have babies" bit. Just priceless. "Don't you be repressing me, Reg."[/QUOTE] That makes a lot of sense. I love that part, too. "You have no womb! Where is the fetus going to gestate? Are you going to keep it in a box??" That whole exchange was just golden lol. I love the People's Front of Judea.

[QUOTE=NorykoAngelcry][SIZE=1][COLOR=darkred]Whaaaa? No Chrono from Chrono Trigger?! What is this blasphemy?! That is one of my favorite characters from any RPG I have ever played. I was also a fan of the main character (the young kid - excuse me for forgetting his name) from Suikoden III. I am not putting any answer on your poll. . sorry, you hurt my feelings by not putting Chrono! [/SIZE][/COLOR][/QUOTE] To be perfectly honest, I found myself not really caring for Crono at all when I played Chrono Trigger. I don't think that he was expressive enough to be a really good silent character. He was just some random dude who was helping to save the world. I liked Magus, Lucca and Robo a lot more, really. EDIT: Off this list, I'd go Dagger/Zidane, because I'm more partial to FFIX than the other games on that list. Overall, though, at the risk of being called a biased Nintendo fanboy, I've always loved Bowser in Nintendo's RPGs. He's not nearly as deep or as thoughtful as many RPG characters, but he's so hilarious and entertaining. And, frankly, I enjoy that a lot more than some depressed, psychologically traumatized pretty boy, or whatever. Bowser is funny, he entertains, and I love him for that.

First off, one hundred bajillion cool points to you for the awesome thread title. Boy, you know just how to catch someone's attention, eh? :smirk: You've always come across as very color-oriented (mostly because you talk about it so damn much :p), so this sort of thing isn't very surprising, to me. Can't say that I identify with it, myself, though. I mostly admire color when I see it, I don't really think of things in colored forms. When I see 'poochy', I think of Poochy from Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island, mostly because that was the name of the dog in that game. Come to think of it, that game was pretty wild and colorful, you'd probably love the visual style of it (I love it, too, it has my favorite 'look' of any game that I've played). With music, things always pop up in my head when I'm listening to it, for no real reason. I think up a lot of ideas when I'm just laying around listening to music. A lot of times, I find that music can tell some pretty vivid stories in your head, in very subtle ways. I can't think of any direct examples at the moment, though lol. Anyway, I find this all very interesting.

[quote name='Pontius Pilate']He has a wife, you know. Do you know what she's called? She's called... Incontinentia. Incontinentia Buttocks.[/quote] :D Yeah, Pilate's and Biggus Dickus' lisps are so ridiculous that they're really hilarious. I wonder if they just just decided to give them lisps for the hell of it, or if there was some real reason behind that? lol I think most of my favorite scenes in the movie involve Reg, the leader of the People's Front of Judea. Lines like "What Jesus fails to realize is that the meek are the problem" are just gold, haha. And I love that he hates the Romans so much, yet his group is so inactive and unwilling to do anything about it, despite what Reg says. Silly Judean bureaucracies.

The end result of all of Donkey Kong's tango lessons has finally come into fruition.

Yes, the Monty Python film that's [i]better[/i] than Holy Grail. :) I first saw Life of Brian a few months ago. My dad has it on DVD, and I liked Holy Grail a ton when I first saw it, so he told me to go watch Life of Brian. I liked it a lot, but as is always the case with me, I didn't fully appreciate the humor on my first viewing. Fast forward to about a week ago. My sister had finally seen Holy Grail (she wanted to watch it after her teacher showed a bit of it during her AP European History class - how cool is [i]that[/i]?), and she wanted to watch Life of Brian. I popped the movie into the DVD player, and we both proceeded to laugh like crazy during the entire movie. It was so awesome. Quick primer, Life of Brian takes place during the time of Jesus Christ. Brian is a young man who hates the Romans, and hates being under their oppressive rule. He joins the People's Front of Judea ([i]not[/i] the Judean People's Front), and things happen from there. Eventually, Brian is mistaken for the Messiah (i.e. Jesus Christ), and he ends up with a cadre of people who wish to become his followers. This freaks him out, understandably, as Brian does not want to lead a bunch of people. That's only a taste of what happens in the movie, though. The whole thing is so funny, from [spoiler]the stoning with all of the woman dressed up as men so that they can attend[/spoiler] to [spoiler]Pontius Pilate and his "fwiend in Wome named Biggus Dickus"[/spoiler], the movie is jam-packed with hilarious stuff. It's not [i]quite[/i] as obviously laugh out loud funny as Holy Grail, I think, unless you're able to appreciate the brilliant satire of the movie. Oh, and what brilliant satire it is. Obviously, it is a satire of Christianity, but what makes the movie so great is that it satirizes not the religion itself, but some of the obsessive kooks who follow it. [spoiler]The people arguing over Brian's shoe and the gourd that he bought are the funniest examples of this. I'd say that's the Python Crew's explanation for all of the different denominations of Christianity lol.[/spoiler] What's even better about it is that it's not done mean-spiritedly; if you go into it with an open mind, I don't see how any of the religious material could really offend you. I thought that it was expertly done, and very funny. Lastly, I could not end this without mentioning the ending, which is one of my favorites for any movie. [spoiler]Eric Idle's "Bright Side of Life" is absolutely [i]perfect[/i] for the scene, and so side-splittingly hilarious for the situation. Everyone is going to die a slow, suffocating death on crucifixes over the next few days, yet they are all singing to Brian about looking on the "bright side of life". It's so great lol.[/spoiler] Anyway, that's enough from me. Who else has seen the movie? Did you like it? Dislike it? And remember everyone - always look on the bright side of life. :)

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that the guy who said heh every couple of words was hilarious. Christ, people complain about 'lol' and then they say 'heh' a million times a day. I swear, 'heh' is just as, if not more, annoying than 'lol' is. It's even funnier when people claim that they're trying to cut down on saying 'lol' and 'heh' just becomes a substitute for it. Brilliant plan, there :rolleyes: Anyway, that was a ramble. Another thing...I can't believe that a couple of people didn't find this chapter funny. Maybe I'm just a giant nerd, but all of the wordplay made me laugh quite a bit. I don't get why people wouldn't find it funny, but whatever. Different strokes for different folks, after all.

I need to start reading and giving critique more regularly... I liked the story. As has been said by others, the imagery is very morbid and beautiful, at the same time. I can appreciate it, even though I do not delve into this type of imagery very often when I write short stories. Perhaps someday, though. Reading the story, you get a very good sense of this girl's madness as she stands on the very edge of life. Truly sad that she chose to make the final leap, but I wasn't expecting some sort of bubbly, happy ending with birds and flowers and all that crap, either. Very good stuff. I always enjoy reading your short stories, Karmi.

You know I'm a big fan of these, and not just because I'm in them so much :rolleyes: These are well written, though. Everyone who doesn't visit Alan's blog to keep up with these should know that they get [i]much[/i] better and more involved as they go along. I'm pretty certain that Alan first intended this to be a one-shot thing, and then they just grew into something massive. lol

Lately I've been fascinated with the subconscious, dreams, and people's perceptions of these dreams (a theme that was reflected in my last short story, which I only posted on myOtaku[/shill]). The following is a three-part short story that will play on that. Maybe I'll offer up some long-winded explanation of the story when I'm finished. Depends on if a number of people criminally misinterpret the story :) Anyway, enough chatter from me, here's the first part of the story. The psychologist glanced down at his watch. It was now a quarter past 10:00 AM. His patient was fifteen minutes late. It was just like a child to saunter in whenever they felt like it. He didn?t let it get to him, however, as he had dealt with many children in the past. This type of behavior was not unusual, just slightly annoying. As the seconds passed by, the clock hanging on the wall above the door ticked away. Tick, tick, tick. The incessant ticking of the second hand started to grate on the psychologist?s nerves. His temper began to rise slowly. His hand gripped tighter and tighter upon the pencil he was holding. The ticking of the clock filled the room, louder and louder, until it was the only sound the psychologist could hear. His mind could focus on nothing else. His left eye twitched madly, and his arms were shaking. The pressure that he was exhorting onto the pencil built by the second. The door opened, the pencil snapped in his hand, and everything went back to normal. The ticking died down and the psychologist?s frayed nerves smoothed over. A young man walked into the room. He was of average height, with average looks. He had short brown hair, and brown eyes that glimmered with intelligence. He was fairly skinny and the clothes that he was wearing hung off of him loosely. After the psychologist gave him a once over, he determined that he was not very threatening. ?Sorry I?m late, Doc,? the young man said. ?The traffic was terrible.? ?It?s the middle of the school day,? the psychologist said, raising an eyebrow slowly. ?I know!? the young man exclaimed. ?That?s what?s so amazing about it! You wouldn?t think that you?d have a tough time getting to your office, but that?s what happened.? ?I?m sure,? the psychologist said snidely. ?Please sit down, and I?ll retrieve your file from the cabinet.? ?Sure thing, Doc,? the young man said, sitting down. ?And please don?t call me ?Doc,?? the psychologist said, rolling his eyes. ?My name is Dr. Whimsley, and you will refer to me as such.? ?Gotcha, Doc,? the young man said, plopping down upon the couch and stretching out. Dr. Whimsley groaned softly to himself, and began sifting through the papers. After a few seconds of searching, he procured a file and brought it out of the cabinet, then closing the cabinet door with a loud clang. He tossed the file gently onto his desk, and the papers jutted out slightly from the manila folder. ?Brosnahan, Chris,? Dr. Whimsley said. ?This is your file, correct?? ?Yes, sir,? Chris said. ?Unless there is another Chris Brosnahan that you know of on campus.? Dr. Whimsley ignored this remark and sat down behind his desk, probing through the papers in the small folder. ?Why exactly are you here?? Dr. Whimsley asked. He obviously knew why the boy was here, his parents had scheduled this meeting, after all, but he wanted to hear it straight from the boy?s mouth. ?Well,? Chris started. ?My parents made me come here. They seem to think that I?m going crazy or something. It?s a bit weird; I think that they?re just being paranoid.? ?And why would they think that you are going crazy?? Dr. Whimsley asked. ?I dunno,? Chris said. ?I don?t do anything wrong, really, at least not compared to most guys like me. It?s not like I picked up a butcher knife and tried to murder my mom over a slice of roast beef, or anything.? ?Of course,? Dr. Whimsley said flatly. ?Are you a writer of some sort?? Dr. Whimsley knew that parents sometimes grew concerned over things that their children wrote. ?Kind of, sort of,? Chris said. ?Would you care to elaborate?? Dr. Whimsley asked. ?I write sometimes,? Chris said. ?But I only write when I dream. I don?t think I?m creative enough to come up with something on my own. But then I have these really cool dreams at night, and I just have to write them down. You know what I mean, right?? ?Yes, yes,? Dr. Whimsley said, smiling to himself. Now they were getting somewhere. Dreams were Dr. Whimsley?s field of expertise. ?Please continue.? ?I don?t really write anything else,? Chris said. ?Just the dreams. They?re the only things that I can see clearly enough in my mind to write down well.? ?Do your parents read these writings?? Dr. Whimsley asked. ?Yeah, sometimes,? Chris said. ?I used to show the writings to them all the time, but not really anymore.? ?Why not?? Dr. Whimsley questioned. ?I don?t think that they liked them,? Chris said. ?They liked some of the early ones?but as they progressed, I think they got kind of freaked out by them, to be honest. There was one that they loved because it was funny. Another one kind of confused them, and the last one disturbed them a bit, I think.? ?Would you care to tell me about them?? Dr. Whimsley asked kindly. ?You wanna hear about them, Doc?? Chris asked. ?Yes,? Dr. Whimsley said through gritted teeth, barely suppressing the urge to strangle Chris. ?I would like to hear about your dreams very much.? ?Sure thing,? Chris said. ?I?ll try to remember it as best I can?I guess I?ll start with one of the early ones, then?? It was high noon on a hot, bright day. The town was empty; everyone was either in the saloon or shut up in their homes. The hot, harsh wind whipped against my tanned, unshaven face as I galloped into town on horseback. I gripped the reins tightly, bobbing up and down on the saddle to keep my balance. My horse rode into town, and I pulled back on the reins, telling it to slow down. The horse cruised to a halt, rearing up into the air as it stopped. I turned over to the side, and attempted to jump off gracefully, but the spur of my left boot got caught in the leather saddle and I fell face first onto the ground. As I pushed myself up off of the ground, spitting dust, sand and dirt out of my mouth, only one thought crossed my mind: I knew I should?ve worn that bandana over my mouth today. Before I knew it, I was being dragged off by the horse; apparently, my spur was still caught in the saddle. I hopped on one foot as the horse trotted around, and I smacked its behind repeatedly with my gloved fist. ?Damn you, horse!? I yelled. ?Slow down, my foot?s caught in the saddle!? I pulled and tugged on the spur, and pried it loose from the saddle. The resulting momentum sent me sprawling to the ground. I got up quickly and dusted myself off. My blue jeans and shirt were covered in dirt, but not so much that I couldn't smack it all off with my hands. I was glad, and lucky, that the guns in my side holsters had not gone off. Over the past couple of weeks, I?d had a few accidents concerning those. I was still wondering how the farmer was doing. I ran my hand quickly through my thick, brown hair, and then removed it just as quickly when I realized that my hand was still covered in dust. I looked around and was relieved to see that nobody had seen my gaffe. I spotted the local saloon, and decided that a nice drink would do me nicely, especially since it was so hot. I walked over to the wooden walkway leading up to the saloon, and stepped onto it. As I sauntered over to the bar, I could hear my spurs digging into the wood with each step. [i]Chink chunk, chink chunk, chink chunk[/i]. And then I stopped. [i]Chink chunk, chink chunk, chink chunk[/i]? I knew that didn?t sound right. I looked down at my boots, and noticed that the spur of my right boot was missing. I grumbled to myself and backtracked a bit towards the entrance of the walkway. There, in the middle of the dirt and dust, I spotted my spur. As I made my way towards it, however, the wind kicked up a bit and blasted some dirt into my eyes. ?Son of a bitch!? I yelled, rubbing at my eyes. Stinging tears flowed from my eyes as they attempted to wash away all traces of the dirt that had flown into my face. I rubbed the last bit of dirt away from my eyes and squinted down at my spur. Actually, I glanced down at where I thought the spur was, as the spur was not there, anymore. A short gust of wind kicked up a small mass of dirt, and a tumbleweed rolled slowly across the pathway. I took a deep breath, calmed myself down, got on my hands and knees and began feeling around for my spur. ?Ow!? After a few moments of searching, I found my spur. I sucked tenderly on my index finger, which had been poked by the spur?s razor-like points, and then I spit it out after I realized that it had been rummaging through the dirt for the past five minutes. I took my spur and twisted it back onto my boot, good as new, if a bit dirty. I stood up and wiped the sweat from my brow. Just about everything that could have gone wrong, did go wrong, and it was more than a bit annoying. I walked back up to the walkway, and entered the saloon through the swinging doors. I walked forward a bit, and one of the doors smacked against me. I stopped, and glared at it for a moment, before gazing around the room. The saloon was filled to the brim with people. There were several people at the front gulping down drinks and chatting with the bartender. The piano man was in the corner playing the same song that I hear in every single saloon in the world. Would it kill them to get different music? No, it wouldn?t. I walked forward slowly, confidently?but nobody was paying attention to me. They were still chatting away, playing poker, smashing each other with chairs or whatever the hell it was that people did in the Old West. I cleared my throat loudly in an attempt to gain their attention. It didn?t work. ?Hey!? I yelled. ?I?m a mysterious stranger and I?ve just walked into your stupid saloon, pay attention to me!? But nobody paid attention to me. ?You idiots, your saloon is shoddily put together, your patronage is poor, at best, and your father smells of elderberries!? Still, nobody paid attention to me. I was starting to get a bit annoyed. I snatched a bottle of some drink that a person was drinking, and I drank it down in one gulp. It wasn?t bad, but it wasn?t good, either. It was sort of meh. ?Where did my drink go?? the man whose drink I stole asked. I smashed the bottle over his head, and stormed up to the front, where there was still one stool available. I plopped down on the seat, and rested my elbows on the table. ?What?ll it be?? the bartender asked me, cleaning a few glasses with a dirty rag. ?I don?t know,? I said. ?Just give me a shot of something?whiskey, I guess.? The bartender?s handlebar mustache twitched slightly, and he fixed up my drink. He set down the shot glass in front of me, and I snatched it and gulped it down. ?Slow down,? the bartender said. ?You have to make that stuff last.? ?I?ll drink it however the hell I want,? I growled. ?Hey, don?t throw a fit or anything,? the bartender said. ?If you start making trouble, I?ll throw you out onto the streets.? ?Fine,? I said. ?Whatever, I?m not interested in making trouble.? ?Heh,? the bartender laughed. ?You passing through town or somethin?? I ain?t seen you here before.? ?Yeah, I?m just passing through,? I said. ?I try looking for adventure, you know a bad guy to capture, but I never find anything. I guess I?m just not cut out for that sort of thing.? ?Most people aren?t,? the bartender said, still cleaning his glass. ?But at least you?re trying.? ?I suppose,? I replied. ?I?ve never even seen an evil villain, though, so how hard am I really trying?? ?Believe me,? the bartender said. ?Evil villains are bad news. You meet one of them, and you?ll be wishing you never saw one of them before.? ?Eh,? I said. ?You know, your glass would be a lot cleaner if you washed it with a clean rag.? ?You don?t tell me how to do my job, and I don?t tell you how to do yours,? the bartender replied sternly. I shrugged and leaned my head against the table. ?Stop moping around,? the person sitting next to me said. ?It?s unbecoming.? ?Eh?? I said, looking up. There was a person sitting next to me dressed exactly like I was, with the same poncho and everything, but he looked different, somehow. He was covering his face with a ten-gallon hat, for one. His skin was a lot smoother and cleaner looking than mine, for another. ?How do you keep your skin so clean and smooth looking in this town?? ?Bathing helps,? the person said. ?Having naturally smooth skin helps, too, I guess.? ?Heh,? I said. ?Smooth skin, huh? That?s kind of rare in guys.? ?What the hell are you talking about?? the person asked. ?I?m not a--? ?What?s your name?? I asked. ?My name is Jessica,? the guy said. ?Jesse Ka?? I replied. ?That?s an odd name.? ?Please stop talking to me,? Jesse said. ?Just leave me alone.? ?Hey, I was just trying to make some conversation,? I said. ?You know, talk a little, discuss.? ??are you hitting on me?? Jesse questioned. ?Whoa, whoa, whoa!? I yelled, throwing my arms into the air. ?I don?t swing that way, buddy!? ?You?re such an idiot,? Jesse said. ?Just like half of the wannabe-heroes around here.? ?What are you talking about?? I asked. ?Nothing,? Jesse said. He kept his mouth open to say something more, but there was a commotion at the front of the saloon that drew our attention. A large man had burst in through the front, throwing the swinging gates off of their hinges. The man was tall and rugged, a full beard covering his large, tanned face. He peered around the room with wild, brown eyes and stepped forward menacingly. The little bit of light that was shining in through the door and windows made him look eerily shadow-like. I?m positive that all of the black that he was wearing had something to do with that, too. ?Who?s that?? I asked the bartender. ?That?s Black Bart IV,? the bartender answered. ?The rootinest, tootinest, most villainous cowboy on his side of the family tree.? ?Villainous, eh?? I asked, lost in thought. ?Yeah, villainous,? the bartender answered. ?And if you know what?s good fer ya, you won?t mess with him.? His words did nothing to convince me, however. Visions of gold and a harem of women worshipping me were dancing through my mind. If I could somehow fell Black Bart IV, then I?d be the most famous cowboy this side of the?er?wherever the hell I was. ?I?ll do it!? I said to myself. ?I just need a nice crowd to back me up!? I looked around the saloon. All who remained were me, the bartender, Jesse, Black Bart IV, and the piano player. ?I hate that damn song!? Black Bart IV bellowed suddenly. He took out his massive rifle, and shot the piano. The piano player stood up slowly, stared wide-eyed at Black Bart IV, and left the saloon without saying a word. ?You?d best get out of here right now,? the bartender whispered. I stood up and walked right in front of Black Bart IV. ?Hey, you fool, didn?t you listen to me at all?!? ?Hey, Bart,? I said, poking at his chest. ?I?ve got a bone to pick with you.? ?Who the hell are you, midget?? Black Bart IV growled. ?My name isn?t important,? I said. ?At least, it?s not important until after I kill you. I suppose that the townspeople will have to know my name so that they can cheer it endlessly.? ?Is that so?? Black Bart IV asked. ?Yeah,? I said. ?Yeah, it is.? ?Then let?s step outside,? Black Bart IV sneered, before turning and lumbering outside. I followed him outside excitedly, the swinging door hitting my backside as it had when I entered the saloon. I glared down at it for a second. It took a moment for my mind to register that the doors had been knocked off of their hinges earlier. However, this train of thought was hurting my brain, and I shrugged my shoulders and walked out onto the dusty street. Even though I had not been in the saloon for very long, the sun was starting to set. The sun?s rays cast a dark orange glow upon the town, setting a somewhat surreal look to our showdown. ?I?m ready when you are, Bart,? I said. My arms hung loosely at my sides, and my hands twitched near my gun holsters, ready to draw at a moment?s notice. As I gazed into Black Bart?s steely eyes, a bead of sweat trickled down the side of my head and onto the ground. ?You?re nervous,? Black Bart IV said, laughing. ?I knew you were all talk.? I closed my eyes, brought out my guns and got ready to squeeze the trigger. A shot rang out through the air, and I heard a loud thump. I opened my eyes slowly, my teeth chattering, and gasped sharply. Black Bart IV?s body was lying on the ground, blood pouring slowly from the side of his head. I looked around frantically, trying to figure out just what had happened. ?He wasn?t very tough to kill,? a voice said. ?I don?t see what all of the fuss was about.? I looked over to the side, and saw Jesse emerge from the saloon. He blew some smoke from his gun, and set it back into its holster. The spurs on his boots clanged loudly against the wood of the walkway, and then kicked up some sand as he walked out onto the dusty street. ?Jesse?? I asked. ?You killed Black Bart IV?? Jesse glared at me. ?My name isn?t Jesse,? he said. ?It?s Jessica!? At that moment, a large gust of wind blew through the town. The ten-gallon hat that Jessica was wearing got caught in the wind, and flew away, revealing the face of a pretty young girl. An old man ambled out from a building near Jessica. He walked but a few steps before the hat flew into his face. Jessica stood glowering at me, her long brown hair blowing softly to the right. The soft orange glow of the setting sun framed her beautifully, making her appear larger than life. ?Whoa,? I breathed. ?You?re hot!? ?How did a brain dead loser like you ever hope to become a hero?? Jessica asked, raising an eyebrow at me. ?Well,? I said. ?I figured I?d kill Black Bart IV somehow, and everything would take care of itself after that.? ?I see,? Jessica smirked. ?And now that I?ve killed Black Bart IV, just what are you going to do?? ?Um,? I stammered. ?I guess I?ll be heading off now?unless you want to come with me, or something.? ?No,? she said. ?I?m not going anywhere.? ?Okay then,? I replied. ?I?ll leave now. It was nice meeting you, Jesse?er?Jessica. Sorry about that.? ?You?re not going anywhere, either,? Jessica said. ??why not?? I asked. ?Killing Black Bart was painfully boring,? Jessica said. ?I need a little more fun before I head out of town.? ?Oh, I see,? I said. ?I?m sure there?s some sort of town fair near here. The animal showcases and pie eating contests are always fun.? ?That?s not the sort of fun I had in mind,? Jessica said, a curious glint in her eye. ?You wanted a showdown, didn?t you? Well, you?re going to get one right now. Except you?re not going to be fighting Black Bart IV, you?re going to be fighting me.? ?Er,? I said. ?Aren?t there more productive ways that we could be having fun together?? ?No,? Jessica replied flatly. ?Get ready for a shootout, and hope that you make it out with your life intact.? She took off her poncho and tossed it aside, revealing the two guns stuck in the holsters hanging loosely on a leather belt wrapped around her waist. Her arms dropped down to her sides, perfectly still, except for her fingers, which wiggled in short, excited bursts of movement. I dropped my arms to my sides, and attempted to imitate her. My arms twitched nervously, and my fingers moved up and down in exaggerated loops. Though the sun was still setting, its rays hit my face straight on. Sweat trickled slowly down my face, falling onto the dusty ground, falling into my eyes. After a moment or two, I raised my arm up to my head to wipe the sweat from my forehead. I heard a loud bang, and then felt something pass by the right side of my face quickly. My right cheek burned and stung painfully, and I felt something drip slowly down the side of my face. I felt my cheek up with my right hand. Blood was flowing slightly from a very fine cut on my face. ?Christ,? I whispered. ?She could?ve killed me.? ?Maybe you?ll pay better attention next time,? Jessica said, twirling her gun with a flourish before packing it back into its holster. ?You?re lucky that I at least have some semblance of honor.? She looked over at Black Bart?s fallen body. ?Your friend over there would likely have killed you on the spot.? ?I guess I should thank you, then,? I replied. Jessica kept silent, her hands were lowered back into the position they were in before she shot at my face. I took a deep breath, let it out slowly, and mimicked her. The wind had died down slowly, but it was still decently strong. A small gust kicked up a cloud of dirt around my feet. A big, round tumbleweed rolled slowly across the street. In my head, I could hear some music playing, music that at once felt familiar, yet I could not place where I had heard it from. I couldn?t shake the feeling that it would be utterly appropriate for this situation, however. And then came the stare down. We were locked onto each other, our bodies as still as statues, our spirits bunched up and ready to fight. I had a look of pure intensity on my face. I tried to put on the most intimidating look that I could muster. ?Hey,? Jessica called out. ?My eyes are up here, idiot.? ?Oh,? I muttered. ?Uh, sorry.? I moved my gaze up to her eyes and locked on to them. Though it was hot, my teeth were chattering slowly. My intimidating stare was faltering, as she gave me a steely-eyed gaze in return. She was completely still, and yet still appeared bunched up, wound and coiled like a snake, ready to uncoil and strike at a moment?s notice. Jessica threw a quick wink in my direction. She was toying with my mind. This was the moment of truth, the moment where my manhood would be tested. Would I live or die? The ball was in my hands, but it would?ve been nicer had I known what kind of ball it actually was. A baseball, or a football, perhaps? All these thoughts of balls troubled me. I focused back on Jessica, fearful that she would shoot me again. ?Draw!? she yelled suddenly, her hands plunging into her holsters and pulling out her guns. I instinctively leapt to the side and rolled onto the ground shoulder-first and ran off for cover. I could hear a couple of bullets whiz by behind me, but I kept on running. I ran over towards a barrel that was by a building. I dove headfirst towards the barrel, and rolled behind it, taking as much cover as I could. More bullets darted above my head, and cracked against the wooden columns, splintering off pieces of wood onto me. I leaned backwards against the barrel. I was breathing heavily, my heart was pounding, and my blood was racing. Before this, I hadn?t known what it was like to run purely on adrenaline, but I was sure that this is what it felt like. I looked down at the guns hanging loosely on my belt. I had a distinct feeling that I would not be needing them very much at this point. This wasn?t a game of shoot and kill, this was a game of survival. My mouth was very dry, and my lips were chapped. I licked them a couple of times, but they dried up very quickly. I was sweating a bit, but I was nearly dehydrated. I coughed a very dry cough, and then I heard a loud bang. Water surged onto my head, washing the sweat off of my face. I took a few quick sips to re-hydrate myself. After a few moments, the flow of water halted. I rubbed my hair curiously; it was now matted flat against my head. I looked up, and saw a clean bullet hole in the barrel, slightly over the top of my head. ?You can?t hide there forever,? Jessica yelled out. ?Unless you want me to shoot you out of there, I?d suggest that you move!? I didn?t have to be told twice. I popped up quickly, and dove behind the wooden column. Two more shots rang out over my head, and one of them hit a window pane, shattering away large shards of glass. I froze for a second, and then I forced myself to get up and move. I ran on the wooden path, ducking and darting between the wooden columns for cover. Bullets seemed to spray from all directions as I twisted and turned to evade them. Little splinters of wood jumped out at me, dislodged from the walls when the bullets exploded into them. I soon approached the end of the pathway. There was a small railing separating the path that I was on from another path. I ran as fast as my tired legs could carry me, and I bounded over the railing. Looking ahead quickly, I spotted an open window. If I could make it in time, I would be able to jump inside of the house and get some nice protection from Jessica?s assault. I sprinted over to the open window, my muscles throbbing with soreness, but I was cut off before I could leap inside. There was an old man standing at the window, staring out from the inside of the house. ?This is my home!? the old man shouted. ?Go away!? ?You don?t understand!? I said. ?I have to get in!? Instead of answering me, the old man reared back and punched me in the nose. I cried out in pain, holding my hands up to my nose, and I stumbled backwards. I ran into another railing and tumbled out onto the street. As soon as I realized where I was, my arms and legs shot out everywhere, desperate to get some balance and run off and hide. However, I only succeeded in making it to the middle of the lonely, dusty street. I froze in a panic. My eyes darted everywhere, heavy paranoia setting in. Everywhere I looked and listened, I could hear something happening. There was the sound of a twig snapping in the corner. I could see a flash of movement on my right side. Straight ahead, I thought I spotted a faint shadow, distorted by the setting sun. My mind was everywhere at once, not focusing on one thing, but faintly recognizing many things. I didn?t know what was what anymore. And I couldn?t hear her sneaking up on me. At the last second, I heard her spurs digging through the sand, but it was too late. As I turned around, the barrel of her gun was pointed directly at my forehead. My eyes went wide for a second, and then I did the only thing that popped in my mind at the moment: I got onto my knees and pleaded for mercy. ?Please don?t kill me!? I shouted, my eyes clenched tightly shut. ?I?m too young to die! I have so much to live for! I don?t know what any of it is yet, but I?m sure that I have a lot to live for!? My head was bowed slightly, and my hands were clasped together securely. I tried to look amazingly pathetic, which, now that I think about it, wasn?t really much of a stretch for me. ?Get up,? Jessica said. ?I?m not going to kill you.? ?Oh please, God, I?ll never do a bad thing again if I live through this, I swear!? I shouted. ?Wait, what did you say?? ?I?m not going to kill you,? Jessica stated. ?Now get up, you?re annoying me.? ?I can?t believe that it actually worked!? I said, bounding to my feet. ?Your stupid charade didn?t work at all,? Jessica smirked. ?I wasn?t going to kill you in the first place.? ?You weren?t?? I asked. ?Of course not,? Jessica said. ?I just wanted to have a little fun with you, that?s all. I don?t kill anyone unless they have it coming to them.? ?Just wanted to have a little fun?!? I asked. ?What kind of sick, sadistic freak gets their jollies from chasing around someone scared half-to-death with a gun?!? Jessica frowned at me, and I shut up. ?Sorry, it won?t happen again.? ?Don?t worry about it,? Jessica replied. ?I?ll let it go.? ?So, what now?? I asked. ?I?m finished here,? Jessica said. ?I?m going to head off now. I have other places to go.? ?Well,? I said. ?Maybe I?ll see you around sometime.? ?Maybe you will,? Jessica said. ?It?s a small world, after all. Just try to be less of an idiot the next time I see you, okay?? A horse approached Jessica, carrying her hat. She took it, put it onto her head, and jumped onto the horse?s saddle. ?So long, Cowboy.? ?Yeah,? I said. ?So long to you, too.? Jessica whipped on the reins, and the horse galloped off quickly towards the setting sun. I wiped my forehead with my sleeve, and breathed a sigh of relief. After what had went on the past?however long I?d just been there, I was lucky to be alive. But I couldn?t help but think that there was something wrong, something not quite right. And then it hit me. ?Hey!? I shouted off into the distance, my hands cupped around my mouth. ?You stole my horse!? Comments, critique, etc. are all appreciated. The tone of this first part was meant to be humorous, but don't expect the next two parts to reflect that. Well, the second part might, depending on the style I choose to write it in, but third part will definitely not be that funny. But that's by design, of course.

Excellent chapter, Solo. I don't remember if anyone has mentioned this, but I love the way that you write this story. The writing style that you employ for this has a very [i]Phantom Tollbooth[/i] feel to it, and I really like it. The way that you toy with words and phrases is just endlessly amusing. I don't think that I could get enough of it, honestly.

I don't think it's really all that surprising. Even with how much I love Nintendo, you have to admit that re-releasing older games is something that they do quite often, even in a short space of time. As Desbreko mentioned, the first two Legend of Zelda games were re-released not even a year ago on the Legend of Zelda: Collector's Edition disc, and now they're released as part of the NES Classic series. How many times has Super Mario Bros. been re-released over the years? I'm sure that Dr. Mario is no stranger to re-release, either. With that said, though, I'm not really interested in buying it. Money's tight, and I can't really buy games just for collector's value or whatever (I bought Zelda: Collector's Edition, because my NES is shot, and I can't play the first two Zeldas anymore). If I want to play Metroid, I can just switch on Metroid Prime and play it.

I just want to drop in and say that I'll be free to post again, because even though I have Finals coming up soon, I basically have five free days before I take any Finals, so I've got no school those days. Hopefully I'll be posting regularly during Winter Break, as well. Thanks for putting up with me, Solo :p

Yay, FFVII on cell phones, I'm really looking forward to this!!1!!111 :rolleyes: I'm not really into cell phone gaming, I'm not into any of the FFVII spinoffs thus far, and now Square-Enix has combined them both into one glorious game. Feel the joy pouring out from this post! With that said, maybe other people will enjoy it. Eh.