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And so I weep...

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And thus, I weep. My eyes burn, my breath comes in short rasps. I just finished a conversation with my adopted sister. Once upon a time, she was my best friend. She became my sister. She was the one person I knew I could talk to. And now, I can not deal with her. I have an earlier blog describing what happened between me and her, and eventually, we reconsiled. I forgave her. I told her that. Now, she can not be forgiven, or perhaps it is the sting of knowing she has lost her mnd again....and me not being able to help her. Lost within a thousand tears, drowing in an ocean of sorrow, for I have told her good-bye for the final time. I love her, I can't say I don't. Is there nothing I can do to ease this sorrow? This pain that does not cease flinging me against the wall, helpless against it. Powerless, hopless....

Anything else I can say?

Sure. Plenty. But I will spare you, my reader. Reading this little sob story, you probably think I am pathetic. Honestly, I don't care if you think one way or the other about me. I am me. ME. If you don't like ME, then **** off and die, please.

And yes, I'm drinking. Yes, I'm angry. Yes, I'm sad. Yes, I wanna strangle someone because I think it might help me feel better. Yes, I'm chain smoking because there might be legal repercussions because of the aforesaid action.

I might as well just post the ****ing script. I saved it, because I wonder if I should take it to the police or something... she needs help... but, she might just be actually buying this... I don't want her to hate me.. even if we have said out goodbyes.

momo_nb: Hey there.
Saio Cross: hola
Saio Cross: love love love love love love love you!
momo_nb: I want to discuss something seriously with you.
Saio Cross: yes?
momo_nb: The End Times are coming.
Saio Cross: are you okay?
momo_nb: I'm fine.
momo_nb: I'm just worried about YOU.
momo_nb: Please let me speak my piece.
momo_nb: The End Times are coming.
momo_nb: Obama is going to get the Swine Flu everyone's been talking about.
momo_nb: And he's going to assassinated this year in November.
momo_nb: Joe Biden is going to be too sick to go into office and Hilary Clinton is going to be President.
Saio Cross: how exactly do you know thig??
Saio Cross: *this
momo_nb: It's Biblical Prophecy.
Saio Cross: ...........
Saio Cross: alright
momo_nb: Just let me speak my piece.
Saio Cross: continue
momo_nb: before you get judgemental.
momo_nb: Basically Hilary is going to welcome the Anti-Christ.
momo_nb: They're going to be taking away our First Amendment rights.
Saio Cross: i'm not being judgemental, yet, but continue
momo_nb: And take away our guns.
momo_nb: Take away our religion.
momo_nb: And take away our freedom of speach.
momo_nb: speech*
momo_nb: The Anti-Christ is going to influence the United Nations to follow him.
momo_nb: The United Nations is going to force the world to practice Luciferianism.
momo_nb: And he will be the great Deciever.
momo_nb: His sermons and whatnot are going to be broadcasted all over the world over the internet.
momo_nb: Somehow the Anti-Christ is going to show up in a UFO.
Saio Cross: i see.
momo_nb: And Christians everywhere are going to be persecuted.
momo_nb: He'll convince everyone that Satan is the true God and that the God of the Christians is the enemy.
momo_nb: There's going to be a second Holocaust.
momo_nb: Kristopher I'm telling you this.
momo_nb: Because if I'm not taken up in the rapture then they might just gas me to death like they did the Jews back in Germany.
Saio Cross: ok
momo_nb: Do you think you're prepared for a Global Catastrophe?
momo_nb: There's going to a comet heading toward Earth.
momo_nb: And NASA is going to shoot it down and break down into many pieces.
momo_nb: But we're going to have a rain shower of meteors which will nearly destroy the planet.
momo_nb: And the Planet is going to tilt a different direction on its axis.
momo_nb: All of this supposed to happen between 2009 and 2012.
momo_nb: 2012 is the year of the Apocalypse according to the Mayan Calendar.
Saio Cross: i am aware of this.
Saio Cross: at least the myan calandar part
momo_nb: If you're still alive by then, Kristopher, who are you going to serve?
Saio Cross: I shall seve no one.
Saio Cross: *serve
momo_nb: You won't have a choice in the end Kris.
momo_nb: Luciferianism will be widespread by then.
Saio Cross: i shall live my life, and be proud of who I am
momo_nb: Where do you think you're going to go when you die?
Saio Cross: i will not care what religeous ******** is spread around.
Saio Cross: i will die
Saio Cross: wnd of story
Saio Cross: *end
momo_nb: So you're not concerned about Hell?
momo_nb: In Hell you'll be doing all the awful things you've done here.
momo_nb: And have no satisfaction whatsoever.
momo_nb: The drugs, the sex, the hatred.
momo_nb: It'll be amplified by a thousand.
Saio Cross: if me being who I am costs me my life, then i will die proud i had the courage to face my destiny, as who I am, not sniveling at the feet of some ******* who's power hungry and oppressing the people
momo_nb: What I'm trying to get at Kristopher..
momo_nb: Do you believe in God?
momo_nb: Not the oppressor God.
momo_nb: But a true, loving, saving God.
Saio Cross: i believe there is a higher power
Saio Cross: but it's not the 'god' spoken of
momo_nb: If you keep saying those sorts of things.
momo_nb: Satan will become that higher power and control your life.
momo_nb: Even making you believe that you're in control.
Saio Cross: the true higher power is loving, caring, and isn't a bipolar prick like in the bible
momo_nb: The God in the Bible is not Bipolar.
momo_nb: Have you even BOTHERED to read the Bible?
Saio Cross: believe what you want
momo_nb: Without a judgemental attitude?
Saio Cross: no
Saio Cross: i have not
momo_nb: But with an open receptive attitude?
momo_nb: What I'm trying to get at is..
Saio Cross: simply because my kind of people have been persecuted by the very people who read that bible
Saio Cross: since the dawn of time
momo_nb: ...Renounce your homosexuality and become like a monk(if you're not interested in women) and give up the drugs and the hatred.
momo_nb: And give it all to God.
momo_nb: You have to trust in Him.
Saio Cross: .
Saio Cross: ashley
Saio Cross: no
Saio Cross: i am me
momo_nb: You'll never get any satisifaction out of Sin.
momo_nb: It just digs a deeper hole for you in the end.
momo_nb: ...
Saio Cross: i will not give up me being homsexual.
Saio Cross: i will live my life how i wantr
Saio Cross: *want
momo_nb: And not out God wants?
Saio Cross: I AM GAY
momo_nb: Once you serve God you'll never be lonely again.
momo_nb: .............
momo_nb: Why're you getting angry?
momo_nb: It is wrong.
momo_nb: Who's Joshua?
momo_nb: I'd like to meet this Joshua person.
momo_nb: You don't have to have a woman.
momo_nb: Like I said, if you're not interested in women then you should become a monk.
momo_nb: You shouldn't kill yourself over someone else.
momo_nb: Jesus Christ died for your sins. He loved you that much that he sacrificed himsel for that. You don't want his death to be in vain, do you?
momo_nb: himself*
Saio Cross: his death is not in vain
momo_nb: Renounce your homosexuality and start studying the Bible.
momo_nb: The ultimate truth can be found within it.
momo_nb: Give up yourself and give it all up to God.
momo_nb: God doesn't want your life.
momo_nb: He wants your heart.
momo_nb: And once he has your heart he has everything.
momo_nb: He's not a hateful or domineering God at all.
momo_nb: But once you start fearing God -- like the angels have said in the past -- he will say "Fear not. For I am here with you."
momo_nb: ...Are you still there?
momo_nb: brb
momo_nb: Back. Are you there?
momo_nb: Whether you accept this or not, Kristopher..
momo_nb: ..I'm going to Heaven.
momo_nb: I just don't want the Rapture and you not be there with us.
momo_nb: With us in the clouds with Christ.
momo_nb: I just don't want the Rapture to come and you not be there with us. *
momo_nb: You will not believe how much I've prayed for you.
momo_nb: How many tears I've cried on your behalf.
momo_nb: ...
Saio Cross: i have heard your piece
Saio Cross: now you hear mine
momo_nb: Okay.
momo_nb: I'm listening.
Saio Cross: is it not
Saio Cross: the divine right
Saio Cross: that god gave us
Saio Cross: to pursue what makes us as his children happy?
Saio Cross: it is not
momo_nb: Sin never leads to happiness.
momo_nb: It leads to everlasting Hellfire.
momo_nb: It may make you happy for a moment.
Saio Cross: that which is us a humans, in our nature to sin
momo_nb: But it won't make you happy for an eternity.
Saio Cross: it it not
momo_nb: That is why we try to abstain from Sin.
momo_nb: Our very best.
momo_nb: And ask God/Christ for forgiveness of those sins.
Saio Cross: please wait until i finish, ashley
momo_nb: You can't go to Church and live like Hell the rest of the week!
momo_nb: Okay.
Saio Cross: we as humans are sinful creatures
Saio Cross: this is something that not even I will deny
Saio Cross: however
momo_nb: ..?
Saio Cross: love is love, and no matter who shares it, no power, in heaven or hell, can taint it
momo_nb: Love comes from God.
momo_nb: So it has power in Heaven.
Saio Cross: please let me finish
momo_nb: ok
Saio Cross: I am me
Saio Cross: I am the person known as KRISTOPHER RYAAN FULLER
Saio Cross: there is no substitute for me
Saio Cross: there is no replacement for me
momo_nb: Of course not.
Saio Cross: god in heaven
Saio Cross: lucifer in hell
Saio Cross: dare I not fear that this may be true?
Saio Cross: no
momo_nb: You dare make yourself out to be more powerful than God?
Saio Cross: I refuse to accept this
Saio Cross: i do not
momo_nb: Okay.
momo_nb: Just wanted to make sure.
Saio Cross: i beleive
Saio Cross: that the higher power
Saio Cross: is a mixture of everything there is
Saio Cross: why are there so many religeions?
Saio Cross: because there are so many aspects, that is why
Saio Cross: love is love
Saio Cross: gender means nothing
Saio Cross: that
Saio Cross: is hypocritical ******** spread by those who fear it
momo_nb: If God meant for homosexuality to exist he would have never created Eve.
momo_nb: I'm not afraid of it.
Saio Cross: please allow me to finish
momo_nb: Right.
Saio Cross: homosexuality
Saio Cross: heterosexuality
Saio Cross: both are divine rights as humans to choose what makes them happy
Saio Cross: however
Saio Cross: homosexuality
Saio Cross: is not a choise
Saio Cross: *choice
Saio Cross: it is a fact
momo_nb: It is too a choice.
Saio Cross: an unalterable truth
Saio Cross: no it is not
momo_nb: Yes it is.
Saio Cross: let me finish
momo_nb: You might not see it like that because you're so deep into Sin already.
Saio Cross: it is not a choice
Saio Cross: well, i suppose it is
Saio Cross: to remain 'straight'
Saio Cross: and to torture yourself for being unhappy
momo_nb: You'll only be unhappy because you haven't God in the equation.
Saio Cross: or to accept yourself as you are
Saio Cross: and remain happy
momo_nb: It only makes you happy for a short while.
Saio Cross: if i am to burn in hell, then i will gladly do so for BEING HAPPY
momo_nb: In Hell you'll never find any satisfaction.
momo_nb: It'll be tens of thousands times worse than any unhappiness or pain you could feel here on Earth.
momo_nb: And this is for eternity.
momo_nb: There's no reversing it.
momo_nb: Unless you renounce it now and accept Christ into your life.
Saio Cross: you may be listening, but you aren;t hearing me
momo_nb: I heard you.
Saio Cross: no
Saio Cross: you didn't
momo_nb: But my conviction hasn't changed.
Saio Cross: otherwise you would accept this is the way I am
momo_nb: You think that whenever I do or say something that you don't like.
momo_nb: That I'm not listening.
momo_nb: Or it's my medicine.
momo_nb: I did too listen to you.
Saio Cross: it is
Saio Cross: usually, you're nicer
momo_nb: I am being nice.
Saio Cross: you're happiuer
momo_nb: I haven't once been mean in this conversation.
momo_nb: And I am very very very happy.
momo_nb: I just want you to be happy too.
Saio Cross: you don't fling me being gay at me like it's something to be ashamed of
Saio Cross: I AM HAPPY
momo_nb: If you were then why do you have suicidal bouts?
momo_nb: You tried to kill yourself twice in one week.
Saio Cross: because I have moments of weakness
momo_nb: With God there is always strength.
Saio Cross: please
momo_nb: With God there is always strength.
momo_nb: And I'm not ashamed of being a servant of the Lord.
momo_nb: And I'm not ashamed of telling you how it is.
momo_nb: And how you can save yourself.
Saio Cross: i'm glad you're not
momo_nb: I had you blocked.
momo_nb: And I didn't want to talk to you.
Saio Cross: if that is what makes you happy, truly happy
Saio Cross: then go for it
momo_nb: because I wasn't sure how to bring this about to you.
momo_nb: Then I decided to tell you how it was.
momo_nb: And told you to accept Christ as your Lord and Saviour.
momo_nb: And to renounce your sin of homosexuality.
Saio Cross: if this is good bye, then let there be no more words
Saio Cross: it is not a sin to be gay
momo_nb: Yes it is.
Saio Cross: good bye ashlet
momo_nb: It says so in the Bible!
Saio Cross: i love you, no matter what you think
Saio Cross: even now
Saio Cross: and it is with a heavy heart that i nowsay good bye
momo_nb: I love you. And God does too.
momo_nb: Think on what I've said.
momo_nb: Read the book of John and the book of Acts.
Saio Cross: I already have.
momo_nb: Also look over Revelation.
Saio Cross: good bye, my sweet princess
Saio Cross: i will love you forever, but i can no longer deal with this
momo_nb is typing a message.
momo_nb: I'll keep praying for you.
Saio Cross: good bye

If you can't tell, I am Saio Cross.

And even now, through all of the anger, I still cry. I want to wail at the top of my lungs. I understand she's mentally ill, but she attacked such a fundamental part of ME....

I know my tears won't help me. I know crying is useless. It won't make me feel better... I think. I ponder what to do now.... Someone please tell me... give me advice....something!
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Okay, first off, please calm down before you hurt yourself or someone else. Put down the booze and the smokes, m'kay? Please? Get a good sleep and drink a lot of water. It will help your nerves. Taking a cold shower might help as well.

And second, yeah, I think she might be insane or drinking. I mean, anti-christ in a UFO, WTF?! I'm not really sure what to say at this point...it shocks me how awful people can be when they try to shove their ideas onto others. :animedepr
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[SIZE="1"]Um...first off, as a religious-type for quite a long time, I can safely say while the Anti-Christ and the like is Biblical, things associated with the Mayan Calendar are not. ...nor are UFOs, for that matter. Nor is Lucifnajsdjshdfgwhatchahoozit. [Lucifer, yes...but I'm not aware of any religion...]

That said...what exactly is the point of posting this here? This seems something way more appropriate for a blog...and furthermore, the religious talk is just gonna spark even MORE mockery towards religion and the like. Like we need any more of that.

I'm just gonna leave before I get even angrier/annoyed. [/SIZE]
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I'm so unsure of what to do... she was my sister, I thought of her as FAMILY. Family loves one another, right? They don't condemn one for being who they are.

Is this not the truth? Jesus H. ****ing Christ, you'd think I was evil, the way she talks to me.

I mourn her as if she is dead to me, as now she is. My tears will last forever... the scars within my heart burst open into new wounds...... and while I have no more tears to shed, I feel as if I am crying still...

Should I take this to a shrink or something? Or should I let her wallow in this... whatever it is?

This seems to be a repeat of the past....

Like I said previously, I want some advise on whether to take the above script to a shrink, or should I let her be?
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[quote name='Inuyasha Fandom']Should I take this to a shrink or something? Or should I let her wallow in this... whatever it is?[/QUOTE]

Yes. I think you most certainly should. Actually, I think you should be TALKING to someone and getting a hug RUGHT NOW, not posting about it. Please go talk to someone before your emotions get the best of you and you do something you might regret.
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I shall await ExcelExcel to get home and show her this... I have people here, and no, I won't do something stupid.

Besides, my roomies are encouraging the chain smoking.... the strangling someone thing... that's bad, and I would never actually hurt anyone other than myself, and I don't want to do that ever again.
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[quote name='Inuyasha Fandom']I shall await ExcelExcel to get home and show her this... I have people here, and no, I won't do something stupid.

the strangling someone thing... that's bad, and I would never actually hurt anyone other than myself, and I don't want to do that ever again.[/QUOTE]

That's a relief.:animesigh I hope you feel better soon. *checks around for Allamorph* Okay, the coast is clear! *hugs you* Good luck.
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[quote name='Sangome'][SIZE="1"]That said...what exactly is the point of posting this here? This seems something way more appropriate for a blog...and furthermore, the religious talk is just gonna spark even MORE mockery towards religion and the like. Like we need any more of that.[/SIZE][/QUOTE]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]This.

Also, I'm completely unaware of the context of this conversation. I don't know enough about you, the person you are conversing with, or the situation in general to say or do anything about it. You say she's mentally ill, but I have no idea what that means or if that's your viewpoint or an official diagnosis.

In short, I don't know what to tell you. You seem upset, and I think it might be a good idea to contemplate your situation a bit more before saying or doing something you might regret.[/FONT]
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Momo, as I shall remain calling her, was like my sister. She lived with me several times, my own mother viewing her as another one of her children.

Momo, went insane. She screamed out that I raped her in the middle of the hospital the last time she had an episode. I did forgive her, after she had went back on her medicine. She's been on them faithfully, until now.

Momo is skitzophrenic. Also, she's bi-polar. Momo has been on her medicine, and she has gone off of them, or they need to be adjusted. One of the two.

I am homosexual. enough said on that one...

this is the story....
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Inu, Babe. dont agree with the whole anti-Christ coming in a UFO and all that jazz nor do i believe ANYONE can predict when Jesus will return. Because the bible says he will return when we least expect it. and right now everyone is on the edge of their seats awaiting him like rain after a long drought and i believe we have some time left on this earth to redeem ourselves. but anywho....

in somethings she said held truth. And you are right, being gay is not a choice... nether is loving someone... you can fall for anyone... thats beyond control. but where is the sin in this? it is within our action to act upon the lust of the flesh, meaning to sleep with the same sex yeah that?s basically the sin? only becomes males cannot bare children. them doing the actions in take to create life with another male as you would a woman is the sin. But hey we are all born in sin? We all have the want to lie, steal, maybe even kill? but having those thoughts is not the sin? acting on it is. God loves us all? just not the sins that we do, it?s as simple as that. In the end god should be the judge and is.

Inu Please don?t harbor bad feelings for her? I?m sure she didn?t mean to atk you, she only wanted to try and ?save? you but she needs to realize you cant make a person change if they don?t want to. I think you need to make that plan to her.

Cheer up, please.
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To lay with someone you love isn't a sin. Gender doesn't matter, when it comes to love. never has, and never will. I understand she was trying to help. but her mind is closed. I will burn in hell apparently for choosing to be happy, pursuing what makes me happy, for sleeping with my boyfriend.

Apparently, I'm supposed to be unhappy with a woman or be a monk. **** THAT!

I am human. I have the divine right to pursue what makes me happy. Being with a man and making love to the one I love, that is my choice in life. I refuse to be her little image of what makes HER happy.

Please, she tried to rape me TWICE and I think she's trying to make so she has a chance with me, the one person who seems to perfect to her, by flinging my being gay at me as a sin. I HATE RELIGION FOR THAT REASON ALONE.

Yes, I'm angry. Yes, I'm crying again. All of this ******** is just that, ********.
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Well I tend to not pry in others affairs, but this actually hits close to home. My nephew's father is bi-polar and skitz, so I know the strain it can place on EVERYBODY when an episode hits.

The best thing you can do is just take your time and as takuuya said take it that she is trying to help you in a way that seems right to her, but at the same time is wrong.

As far as your ideas go I know you're a good guy who wouldn't act on any tendencies, but that should include pushing your sister away. Sure she aggrevates you, but when she gets back on her meds, or an adjusted dosage, you'll wish you hadn't harbored those feelings.

Now that's just based on the fact that you said she's not normally like this. So when she's even show her the convo and show her how much she hurts you. Not to make her feel bad but to show her how she is off her meds and to help her stay on them. If you truley love her you should help her, not harbor hate against her.

Now that's just me, I'm sure people will disagree and say you shouldn't bother, but you'll decide for yourself.
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Part of me wonders if this is how she will remain. This episode is a repeat of the past. She's not going to fix her meds, she's already admitted so, albeit through a lie, saying the reason she's acting like is because there is something physically wrong.

A lie. I know that, better than anyone else. There IS no reconsiliation after this.

I wish I could hate her. I really do. But, because she was once my sister, I can't. She is like this until her dying breath, which I know will be soon. That's the direction all of her episodes have gone.

This time, there is no one by her side, who really understands her, and is willing to forgive her. There is no one willing to beleive it's that her meds are off. She's let the one person in the world who cared about her most slip through her fingers.

Part of me wonders if she is dying, and she's pushing me away so I don't see it. Part of me wonders if this is her off of her meds. Part of me wonders if she IS on her meds... and has been brainwashed or some weird **** like that.

All of it sounds ridiculous, the conversation me and her had. Hilary helping usher in the anti-christ in a UFO aftr Obama gets swine flu? Laughable.

Does the conversation me and her had make me look like a bad person? I wonder if I am, for being like that with her.

As I said, this is not the first time something like this has happened. She's gone back to how she was, and there is no fixing it, as much as it pains me to say it.
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Wow. ****** up. Anti-christ in a UFO?:hippy: dide, what hell kind of drugs is she snorting? Or smoking? I want to know so I know never to take it.

And dear Jesus Christ, what the hell has she been watching? I think she's mixing up Armageddon with Left Behind. As well as gone off her rocker. Lovely combination, don't you think? I mean, it must be nice to live in her little world.


I support your decision. She's on a never ending loop, and I know her too well myself. Crazy fat *** biotch.

Odds are, she will try to kill you as well. You know this already, though, don't you? I don't have to be a mind reader to know that. Ashley, as is her real name, is ****ing nuts. There is no saving her. She is lost to the darkness, and you know that. I do too, I just don't ******** about it. She has perpetually proven this, time and time again.

And don't get on me about 'respecting her privacy' or some ******** like that. **** HER. I HATE HER WITH A BURNING DESIRE TO SMITE HER WHERE SHE STANDS. Or wallows in her misery. Whichever. I don't care. I despise her, for everything she's done to you. She treated you like her dumping ground for all her emotional baggage. You were her punching bag anyway.

Ashley ALWAYS goes off her meds eventually. She always goes off of them. She doesn't really care about anything other than what SHE deems acceptible. And obviously, you aren't in her eyes anymore. Sorry, but I can't say I feel the same way as she does.

I say good riddance to the psycho *****. Even now, as you slumber in your room, you dream of her, of the happier times. Those are good memories, and you should cherish them. I know how difficult your life REALLY is. It does not do to dwell on dreams, however. Nor does it do to dwell on the past. She's let the one person who truly loved her slip away from her.

Ashley is a ****ing head case. She's actually buying the **** she's spewing from her mouth, or as in this particular case, fingertips. I've never heard anything so ridiculous in my entire life.

Gassed like a jew if not taken in the rapture, the Anti-Christ Showing up in a UFO...And Hillary being the president to welcome him. Dude, is she even listening to what the hell she's saying? I was laughing my *** off reading that.

Like I said, she's completely off her rocker. Enough said. Count your losses, and get on with your life. Although, considering who we're dealing with here, it's not much of a loss.

I agree that it might be another play to get you to be straight. She might be doing this because it's her excuse for not being able to get laid, the fat psycho *****. She weighs what, almost 300 pounds? Yeah, this is probably her attempt to get you to be WHAT SHE WANTS. You're the kind of person, that no matter how bad *** you may be, you're no different than sugar. Honestly, If you were straight, I would have snatched you up a long time ago. You're the PERFECT MAN, despite what anyone else thinks. And come on, your sense of hmor is astronomical. Of course, whil in the presence of a ****ING paraplegic, you made a superman joke. Dear god, you need a handy dandy 'brain-to-mouth' lid. You never think before speaking.You have almost no tact, and yet, you're awesome. Who cares? I love you for being YOU. You never care what people think, you just lead your life, although sometimes you need a discreet kick in the shin on occasion. Of course, that's one of your charms.

And let's be real, Inu. The only reason you don't like fighting is because you might break a nail. You're so.... so...... FRUITY-LICIOUS! You're awesomeness incarnate. Is there any doubt within you any other time? No. You're always crashing, bashing, and bashing your way through you life, confident as always, a smile on your face as you pant out of breath from your latest endeavor. You give life your all. You don't lack confidence in yourself EVER. I wish I could say the same, despite more or less being the female embodiment of YOU. I mean come on, we've known each other since high school, we have the same birthday, and we both like the same boys... with occasional differences in that department.

We're human. Point blank. HUMAN. We're all prone to our moments of weakness. That's something we can't help. And as for her laughable concept that apparently 'good god fearing christians' never kill themselves, we both know that's not true. Come on, Ashley herself has tried to kill herself, though not as many times as you. She's just crazier. I'm glad I haven't spoken to her in forever.

She's hurt you, too many times for me to count. And yet, you've always forgiven her. I think that you're the closest thing to a saint as they come. To err is human, to forgive divine. You have the purest heart I have ever had the privelidge of knowing.

You, Inu, have a unique way of telling everything in your little fruity head. By screaming it at the top of your lungs. You do it all the time. And It's funny, you unintentionally do it, but hey, that's you. And while most people would say that this is great you can let it all out, (I sure as hell do) obviously, people have never seen you lose it at the local produce aisle in the middle of Kroger's. I have. I found it to be one of the best memories I have.

Life itself isn't simple. It's not black or white, but consists of the infinite shades of gray in between the two.

As I already said, Ashley had hurt you. Beyond belief. I would have told her to **** off back in high school. And yet, there you were, by her side. Always smiling, and offering her your complete acceptance. You knew she was unhinged. You just dodn't know to the extent. Now you do, and you know she is lost within the darkness she perpetually wallows in. Ashley is a lost soul, in the truest sense of the word. She thinks she sees a light, but really, she's only walking down further into the darkness, and for somereason, she's confusing the light in the other direction with the darkness in front of her. She's happy being unhappy. Just without the emo clothes.

Her wide *** couldn't fit into them anyway.

I, on the other hand, look quite splendid with my boobs practically hanging out. I mean come on, with a rack like mine, who wouldn't show them off? Inu, You're the one who helped me have some confidence in myself. I know my tits are abnormally large, but that doesn't mean I have to be a tit about them. I mean come one, you ****ing play the bongos on them. If that's not flattery, the what the hell is? Your sense of humor is how I came to realize just how beautiful body I've been blessed with. I used to think I was chubby, until you came along and buried your homosexual face into them.

I mean come the **** on. Your *** PRINT is on my car's WINDSHIELD! next to various weirdly placed hand prints and foot prints. Jesus, we were so stoned... Those painkillers were awesome.

Anyhoo... Just be strong. We all know you are. You've lost everything, but You have me. And Drizzt. and Takuuya. And Chibi. And countless other people willing to offer you a hand in standing up again on your own two feet and being yourself once more.Take the hands offered, and you'll be just fine.

Smile for me. Those tears on that pretty little face of yours just don't suit you.

Also, on a finishing note. You're already straight, remember? You're a closet hetero.

And if I'm lying, them may god send a lightning bolt to strike m-...er.... Ashley.

*prays she hears a KA-POW! in the next forty seconds.....*


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I think you already know what you need to do Inuyasha Fandom but I'll spell it out before I shut this thread down.[quote name='Inuyasha Fandom]Momo is [B]skitzophrenic[/B]. Also, she's [B]bi-polar[/B']. Momo has been on her medicine, and she has gone off of them, or they need to be adjusted. One of the two.[/quote]So basically this friend of yours suffers from Schizophrenia which basically is a mental disorder characterized by abnormalities in the perception or expression of reality. It most commonly manifests as auditory hallucinations, paranoid or bizarre delusions, or disorganized speech and thinking with significant social or occupational dysfunction.[SIZE="1"] (yes I went to Wiki for that description)[/SIZE] And she has issues with bi-polar depression and you're in here saying [I]there is no reconciliation after this[/I] ... Seriously, wtf?

When did you or your friend ExcelExcel suddenly become qualified medical professionals? I already know the answer to that, neither one of you are. So though I can understand why you'd want to vent on the subject, this is not the place for what I'm seeing here.

So you're gay, that's not even the issue when you stop and think about someone who is clearly mentally ill. And I'm not even going to touch your post ExcelExcel, other than to say I don't want to see that kind of mindless bashing from you ever again. If the two of you want to do that, go post on a real blog instead of making a topic on it.

My advice to you is to talk to a real professional about your friend. I think all of you could use the help. I'm going to close this, if you have any questions as to why, feel free to drop me a pm.

[B]Thread Closed[/B]
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