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[font=trebuchet ms][b]The Legionnaires[/b] are the world?s greatest heroes, and in the shadow of their heroic deeds countless groups of imitators have spring up over time. Some of these groups are met with success, while others are not?.

?This is the story of the losers. Welcome to [b]Hero Patrol[/b].[/font]

[font=trebuchet ms][center][size=5][b]:::What is it?:::[/b][/size][/center]

[b]Hero Patrol[/b] is a parody of not only The Legionnaires, but of OtakuBoards? RPGs in general. While this story is set in the same universe as The Legionnaires, it is distant enough to be enjoyed as an independent entity. Hero Patrol hopes to satirize and glorify the various quirks, stereotypes and clichés that have plagued the boards? various storytelling efforts. This is a comedy, people. Prepare for the absurd.

The characters and adventures of the Hero Patrol directly mirror those seen all-too-often in The Arena. Elemental magic, sexy assassins and tragic pasts are commonplace, and practically prerequisites for joining the group. Think of every RPG sign-up that ever made you cringe by reading it, and then imagine an entire team of them trying to fight crime together. That?s pretty much what this is all about.[/font]

[font=trebuchet ms][center][size=5][b]:::The Story:::[/b][/size][/center]

Hero Patrol was founded for ?heroes? who for one reason or another were never invited to join The Legionnaires. These reasons are varied, and for the most part, obvious. Regardless, Hero Patrol continues to fight the good fight from their base of operations in Gatorville, Florida, and on their mobile headquarters, an 89 Chevy Astrovan. More often than not, they?re too late to save the day, or worse yet, completely unprepared for their battles.

Turnover, often in the form of death, is very high for members of Hero Patrol.[/font]

[font=trebuchet ms][center][size=5][b]:::Sign-Ups:::[/b][/size][/center]

[size=1]To join Hero Patrol players must full out a sign-up thread with the following information:[/size]

[b]Code Name / Call Sign:

Gender (If Applicable):



Personal Appearance (Images are acceptable):


Personal History:

Special Skills or Abilities (If any):[/b]

[size=1]Please be as ridiculous as you would like for sign-ups. Players will be chosen based on the humor, and quality contained in their sign-ups.[/size][/font]

[font=trebuchet ms][center][size=5][b]:::Etcetera:::[/b][/size][/center]

That's it. Sign-ups start now. Hero Patrol's story (or complete lack thereof) is meant to be fleshed out during the course of the RPG. Posting will follow a style similar to The Legionnaires, with players being limited to post a certain number of times per week. There is no set number of players I'd like to accept, but it will be a considerably smaller number than The Legionnaires.

[b]Questions or comments about the RPG can be directed to [url=http://otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=49109]The Legionnaires Underground[/url] thread, located in Arena Underground.[/b]

Sign-ups will last until January 13th, and the RPG will start immediately following that.[/font]
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[size=1]I wondered if HP was going to be something along the lines of humans as wannabe Legionnaires, but I never imagined this :p


[B]Code Name / Call Sign[/B]: Terminator / Fedorov

[B]Gender (If Applicable)[/B]: Male

[B]Location[/B]: Expatriated from Russia in 1989. Now a resident of Gatorville, Florida.

[B]Age[/B]: 42

[B]Personal Appearance (Images are acceptable)[/B]: [url=http://www.emediawire.com/prfiles/2004/09/15/158672/ABF0048.jpg]Here[/url]., [I]sans[/I] excessive tanning. I warn that this image may be entirely disturbing.

[B]Personality/Behavior[/B]: He speaks only limited English, and rarely expresses emotions. He loves vodka and weaponry, and beyond that not much is known about him.

[B]Personal History[/B]: Born Alexander Fedorov, he was an up and coming professional bodybuilder who made his breakthrough appearance winning the 1986 European Championships. Prior to becoming an absolute European champion, Fedorov placed first in the category of men over 80 kilograms (176 lb.) in the 1979 Junior World Championships, won the junior division of the 1982 German Open Championship and was victorious in numerous Russian bodybuilding contests. Despite a serious pectoral tear in September 1986, Fedorov competed in the Grand Prix of Russia on November 5, 1986. Several weeks later he was signed to Universal Nutrition, a large supplement company. Yet over the next two years they phased out their supplement production, transferring into other medicinal fields. This left Alexander without a sponsor, and with bodybuilding interest dying down, without a profession. So, it was late one night, when he had had a few too many vodkas and he saw a news article on the TV, where a superhero picked up a bus full of terrorists and hostages. The terrorists were so afraid that they immediately released all of the hostages.

Without any further consideration he packed a suitcase full of clothes and boarded a plane for America, determined to become one of these Legionnaires. Unfortunately, when he reached America he found out several things. The first being that speaking only limited English restricted his actions. The second being that the Legionnaires weren't really a a group you submitted a resumè to.

The third was that he had no hope of joining, and was too poor to fly back to Russia. And too proud. So, he sought out one of the numerous unofficial vigilante groups.

[B]Special Skills or Abilities (If any)[/B]: Can intimidate, and shoot reasonably accurate. Useful for getting into locked doors, not so useful in small places. Without any special powers, he is more of a liability than anything, but the Hero Patrol needs everyone they can get, and whilst his strength can't match that of the legendary Arachnid of the Legionnaires, he can be useful anyway.[/size]
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[center][font=Tahoma][b]Codename/Callsign: [/b]Hotstuff

[b]Gender: [/b]All man. In fact, he even wishes sometimes he was less of a man!

[b]Location: [/b]Formerly San Francisco, but he now lives in Gatorville

[b]Age: [/b]26

[b]Personal Appearance: [/b]Standing at 5'6", he is really far too small for any of the best clothes. His hips are too wide as well. He just doesn't know what to do with himself! Well, he has blue eyes, all the ladies find them very beautiful (yeah, sure: "ladies"), and his hair is black, but with just a little touch of pink in the fringe, just enough to bring out his natural highlights. A little stylish goatee and tanned skin makes him unbearably attractive.

His costume is the bee's knees, darling. He wears a black spandex one-piece with sequins on the chest, and a low cut collar, just enough to expose his slightly-hairy chest.

Overall, he's a skinny little boy who might just get blown over in the wind some day.

[b]Personality/Behaviour: [/b]Oh, he's as camp as they come, darling. He professes wildly that he's not gay, oh no, he's not [i]like that.[/i] But he does love to make himself up, and he is obssessed with fashion. He was bullied a lot as a child, I'm not sure why...

[b]Personal History: [/b]Born in San Francisco to two mothers, Trelwaney Mavis Davis was obviously going to turn out the way he did. And there were no surprises when he started giving his lesbian mothers fashion advice when he was four.

It wasn't until he was ten that his power first came to light. Literally. He sneezed and set fire to the lounge curtains. That one cost him.

He finally moved away when he was eighteen, to go to fashion school, in Florida. But things took a turn for the worse when his driver took a wrong turn and ended up in Gatorville. Bummer.

The only place for miles was the base of Hero Patrol. He knocked on the door, and they let him in (they need to step up their security a little). He never left. The driver sat there for three days, and finally got tired and drove off.

[b]Special Skills/Abilities (if any): [/b]Oh, he could have gotten into the Legionnaires with his power. But all that superhero stuff wasn't for him. He can create fire, hence the codename. But he doesn't like to. Messes up his hair. And his cuffs. And his entire ensemble.

He's not so good at lifting, it gives him a migraine. And running, no way. Sweat does nothing for an outfit. But one thing he is definitely good at is fashion. He designed the costumes of all of Hero Patrol, although some weren't that well thought-out. Sunglasses aren't a good idea when you have the power of optic blasts.

He can also dabble in interior decorating. He redecorated the entire of Hero Patrol's headquarters almost as soon as he moved in, starting of course with his own bedroom.

(OOC: Just so you know, the sign-up, for maximum effect, should be read in the campest voice possible. Thank you.)
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[size=1]Eh, my humor isn't as wacky, absurdly random, or silly, but I'll give it a shot.

[color=indigo][b]Code Name / Call Sign[/b]- Baby Punk

[b]Gender[/b]- Female

[b]Location[/b]- Born and raised in Venice, California--wound up in Gatorville, Florida (explained in history)

[b]Age[/b]- 17

[b]Personal Appearance[/b] - Kate Carmine, aka ?Baby Punk?, stands around 5?5?, weighing in around 115 lbs. Evenly proportioned, her body is complemented with long, slender legs, curvy torso, and a graceful neck. Living most of her life on a surfboard and skateboard, Kate?s chocolate brown hair has been bleached by the sun and salty air into a light, dirty blonde; her natural hair color can only be seen from root of the hair to about three inches down. She normally keeps it in a very messy bun on the crown of her head, with a few chunks dangling right under her chin. The loose chunks of her hair are usually dyed funky blues, greens, and pinks; accenting her aqua blue eyes. You?d normally see Kate wearing pleated, faded and worn blue jean skirt, a pair of hot pink spandex shorts underneath, a pair of neon orange, sheer knee-high stockings, an over-sized, loose white T-shirt with a local band?s logo, and a pair of old school Vans skate shoes. Her face, which earned her the nick name ?Baby? because it is so delicate and child-like, is speckled with light brown freckles and silver piercing. All together, from her face and body, Kate has 5 piercing. One in her bottom lip, one in her tongue, two on her nose (one for each nostril), and one in her belly button. Find it odd that she doesn?t have her ears pierced? Well, that can be blamed on her best friend for trying to pierce her ears with a knife. Since that day, Kate?s been terrified to let anyone go near her ears.

[b]Personality/Behavior[/b]- Kate has that stereotypical ?surfer? attitude. She?s happy-go-lucky, fun-loving, lazy, but energetic. Surfing and skating, listening and playing music, partying and hanging around is a typical day for her. Though she doesn?t like to steal the spotlight, Kate always draws the attention whenever she enters a room full of people. Perhaps this is why her band chose her to be the lead vocalist.

[b]Personal History[/b]- Kate was born to a mother, Pamela, a ?one hit wonder musician, who made many pathetic attempts to come back, even changed her image but still failed, and is now too old to come back but still tries?, and a father who lives off of his wife?s benefits and has become the ?housewife?, Clyde. The first few years of Kate?s life were composed of constant traveling, living in a tour bus and off of room service. Tired of this lifestyle, Clyde decided that it was enough and left his wife at the bus station in Tallahassee, Florida to head back to Venice, California. He took only enough money to get home, and his daughter.

Though their marriage was hardly a marriage at all, Pamela sent money each month to support her family. Clyde finally found a small job in a local convenient store and gave Kate all that he could. But, no matter how much money, love, and affection he gave her, Kate still resented and needed her mother. There were just some things that only a mother could offer. Despite her mother?s absence, Kate grew up happy and full of friends.

At the age of 13, Kate and a few of her close friends banded together to make, well, a punk band. Kate became lead vocalist and lead guitarist, and got the idea to become better than her mother. For the years to come, Kate never went one day without practicing and striving to get to the top. She got a lucky break at the age of 16 when her band, named ?The Bleach Chicks?, were offered to headline for the most popular punk rock band on the West Coast. Talent scouts quickly snatched them up, and offered the world--until they discovered Kate?s background. The record label was cancelled, and all the bands? hopes were shattered. Angry with Kate, the band dispersed and went their own ways to land deals. Kate was left with nothing but a solid ticket of being the laughing stock of Venice. The embarrassment was too much to bear. Kate withdrew all the money she had saved, packed up in the middle of the night, and ran away to Gatorville, Florida. Why this place? Well, Kate had overheard a fellow musician chatting about the infinite opportunities to land it big time.

Soon after moving in, Kate changed her name to avoid anymore embarrassing and disappointing rejections. She goes by the name Katie Blackburn by day, Baby Punk by night. Kate (as we?ll continue to call her) still struggles to survive, not many Southerners took kindly to her extreme punk, airy, open California personality. During the day, Kate holds down a retail job. Her nights, she performs a solo act in several different show rooms, bars, high school proms, and the such. She?s formulated a band, not much, but something. They called themselves ?The Bikini Bandits? (okay, so I loved that title >>;; ).

Soon, crime started to filter into the peaceful part of town where Kate and the band lived. It began to get so bad, that the band couldn?t get gigs because the bars were forced to close early. Restrictions of where the band was allowed to perform also came into effect. This, was the last straw, the Bandits decided. It was time to take action and rid the once welcoming city of its crippling plague. Kate turned her band into a small group of ?crime fighters?; they are named??The Bikini Bandits?. Their sex appeal, punk attitudes, and bad tempers was a force to be reckoned with. The group was put in the spotlight one day at a bank robbery just blocks away from the police station.

You see, the Bikini Bandits showed up in their array of bathing suits--all just three minutes too late. The police did do justice and saved the bank, but were interrogated, and soon fired, after taking the girls into ?custody?.

[b]Special Skills or Abilities[/b]- Being just a human, teenaged girl, Kate has no mutations or magic skills; but it is said that her guitar riffs can shatter glass and deafen a person. Of course, that is a rumor................>_>; She usually carries her guitar in a sling that is slung around her back. Also, her punk temper can be violent in the form of ?moshing?, if you?ve ever heard of it. When in a crowd of people, and her anger surfaces, Kate lashes out with her legs, arms, and body. It?s simple and popular to other young punks, but it is effective to get the job done when it is necessary---and sometimes unnecessary.
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[FONT=Trebuchet MS][b]Code Name / Call Sign:[/b] Raccoon Glory

[b]Gender:[/b] Male

[b]Location:[/b] Born on Planet Racornia, now lives on Planet Earth--Gatorville, Florida

[b]Age:[/b] Twenty in Racornian Years

[b]Personal Appearance:[/b] Look below...


[b]Personality/Behavior:[/b] Raccoon Glory (or just Cooner, for short) is your typical alien superhero, minus the actual good abilities. Nevertheless, his personality shines through and he insists on getting the job done, even if there's absolutely no hope left. He tends to become cowardly if odds point to him getting "booboos," as he says. He's up for the good fight, but down with the injuries. No wonder his planet banished him.

His intelligence is even less. As such, his often good intentions of saving the day wind up making things rather complicated and dangerous. There are moments where he'll go crazy raccoon on you, but only if you insult or harm something very dear to him. It's believed to be a Racornian trait. Like some sort of Raccoon Rage. Otherwise, he's not very inept to hurt much of anything. He, like many of his people, have what we know as an Arabian accent. Silly Raccoons.

[b]Personal History:[/b] Not to say Racornians are well-respected superheroes in the Universe, but c'mon... they do have some pride. Raccoon Glory (Roy Deye on Racornia, though no one knows that, not even Glory) is basically the black sheep of the whole planet. He screwed things up so badly that not even his semi-amazing powers worked correctly. His main problem was he disgraced his family beyond content and they had no choice, but to banish him to somewhere that he might actually fit in... or get mocked horribly, they really didn't have a preference.

They strapped him into a pod while telling him he's going to Disneyland, punched in some random coordinates, and sent him off into deep space. Only days later did he arrive on Earth, confused, yet found a perfectly nifty Disneyland in California, USA. After getting kicked out for breaking in, he found himself on the streets.

It wasn't long before he heard about superheroes here on Planet Earth. He was amused at their silly different costumes, abilities, and customs. He thought even his regular, every-day Racornian clothes were better. He wouldn't be caught dead in spandex. And he thought his pool-playing power was much more impressive than super strength. Nevertheless, he didn't bother showing off. Instead, he went right to work fighting crime...

... and failed miserably.

He was soon recruited by the Hero Patrol, though he still thought it wasn't to his standards. Racornians are too proud to admit when they suck. And boy, does he suck. He is currently trying to master his shape-shifting abilities, which are a bit of an embarrassment at the moment. Any of his powers are. He's just a little better with a stick... ergo, his weapon is a rod. He has also been familiarized with the annoying catch phrase "Whahaya," which is said to be some kind of native call from Racornia.

[b]Special Skills or Abilities:[/b] Where to begin this mess...

[list][*][b][i]Incredible Weight-Guessing Accuracy![/i][/b] Yes, one of the lamest powers of all time, but it could get you a shiny penny if you make a bet with someone on the street. That or a punch in the lip by a weight-sensitive woman.
[*][i][b]Amazing Pool-Playing Action![/b][/i] If there's one thing a Racornian is good at, it's pool. Man, can they play a mean game of pool.
[*][i][b]Lightning-Fast Metabolism![/b][/i] Wait... that's not a super power...
[*][i][b]Holy Heart Failure! Shape-Shifting Powers![/b][/i] That's right, Jimmy. Raccoon Glory's greatest ability is to shape-shift. Too bad he just plain sucks at it. A shining example of why he was banned from Racornia, Raccoon Glory can attempt at shape-shifting, but always turns out to shift into something completely useless... like a hairnet. Well, useless unless you work at McDonalds.[/list][/font]
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[COLOR=SlateGray][SIZE=1][B]Code Name / Call Sign:[/B] Captain Death/The Shadow/Shade/Night Stalker (He can't decide - real name Dirk Perkins)

[B]Gender:[/B] Male

[B]Location:[/B] The Shadows/Tokyo, Japan, in a secret den of ninja/The pits of Hell (Gatorville, Florida, formerly Detroit)

[B]Age:[/B] He is eternal! (22)

[B]Personal Appearance (Images are acceptable):[/B] A slim spectre of the night, clad in darkest shadow with eyes like burning flames and skin like purest moonlight! His face is forever unknown, but is manly and handsome, and makes women wet themselves from erotic glee, for he is a god of men and, modestly, sex as well. (A small, skinny young man wearing a jet-black ninja costume from the local costume shop, complete with red contact lenses. Extremely pale, and mildly handsome, but nothing to write home about.)

[B]Personality/Behavior:[/B] The Shadow/King of Night/Black Flame/Hell Spectre has no need for emotion or caring. His heart is as cold as his steely gaze, and he is second to none in composure and calmness. The only feeling he ever shows is his burning fury, with which he righteously strikes down his opponents without a second thought. He is a merciless merchant of death, and will let nothing stand in his way!

[B]Personal History:[/B] Dirk was born just a normal man in a small suburb of Detroit, living an ordinary life as the son of a milkman and a banker. He was always a small child, and a strange on at that, preferring the night to the day and always coming home with brusies caused by running into trees in the dark. He was picked on in school for being pale and scrawny, and one day, while his greatest tormentor was trying to hang him off the flag pole by his spiderman underoos, he finally discovered his True Abilities, and...ran away exceedingly quickly, much to the chagrin of the bullying pack.

That night, Dirk traveled deep into the foreboding woods that stood adjacent to his peaceful suburb, and started honing his unnatural skills. Soon, he was able to run faster than any normal person, jump effortlessly over trashcans and low fences, and his deadly Chi-Wai-Go-Dan Dragon Shu-Wei Style Karate left him able to fight off the most vicious second graders with ease (he was in the fifth grade by this point). In addition, his unusually keen senses, trained by years of trying not to run into trees in the dark, made him skilled in combat even when he had his lunch bag or underwear pulled over his face.

By the time he reached highschool, he was an unstoppable force, unable to be defeated by any non-highschooler, and a couple highschoolers, too. He kept training, eventually buying his glorious costume and decided to become a Hero of Justice, cutting down those that would question righteousness without mercy. He even managed to catch a few purse-snatchers, and foiled a robbery. Once. The police helped a little, but he really was cornered.

Anyway, he decided that his strengths were still unrefined, so he needed some guidance in the form of experienced heroes. He traveled around the country in his Chariot of Darkness (Gremlin, Beige. No radio or A/C), visiting heroes in hopes of finding a group to join. Eventually, he reached Gatorville, and signed up with the Hero Patrol. Now, he is a true Hero of Justice, and will defeat those that rival goodness and light! Huzzah!

[B]Special Skills or Abilities (If any):[/B] He can run faster than most, jump quite high, and has hightened reflexes, senses, and a quickened healing rate. Nothing particularly exceptional, just able to keep from dying every once in a while. Additionally, he is skilled in and the master of Chi-Wai-Go-Dan Dragon Shu-Wei Style Karate, a martial art that focuses on dodging using his preternatural (sort of) agility and using the opponents strength against them (since he has little of his own). It's mainly pieced together from cheesy kung-fun movies, and involves a lot more spinning, flipping, and "wa-chaah"-ing than most real martial arts. He owns a (cheap) ninja sword of his own, but rarely uses it, since he hates killing (and the sight of blood).[/SIZE][/COLOR]
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[B]Code Name / Call Sign:[/B] [COLOR=Blue]The Blue Nomad[/COLOR]

[B]Gender (If Applicable):[/B] Male

[B]Location:[/B] Born and raised in America, traveled the world, and ended up in Gatorville.

[B]Age:[/B] 56

[B]Personal Appearance (Images are acceptable): [/B] The Bue Nomad stands a mighty 5'8". His hair is white as lightning, and his 3 foot beard is legendary. His skin has been tanned by the many suns under which he has ridden. They say that the last thing the criminals who have been stopped by him saw was the deep blue of his Buddhist monk outfit. He rides the country on a horse said to have been bestowed upon him by Satan himself!

[B]Personality/Behavior:[/B] The Blue Nomad is a very serious individual (as in overly serious about everything). He is very wise (completely ignorant) and many seek his wisdom on how they should go about things (probably why they screw up so often).

[B]Personal History:[/B] The Blue Nomad's true name was forgotten long ago, though many (2 people) presume it was Charlie. Charlie was just your average boy, well, to be more precise, your average nerd. He was a comic book junkie when Superman was new and he always aspired to be, himself, a vigilante. And so, Charlie bought a horse on his eighteenth birthday and decided to travel the world. Luckily, his father was a big shot movie director and gave Charlie a massive sum of money.

Earning weird looks from everyone he passed, Charlie rode horseback from California to Florida, (almost) stopping many villains on his path, in the most difficult 6 months of his life! He then took a boat to England and rode all the way to the Far East, accomplishing nothing but proving his own bravery (AKA foolishness).

Charlie then stopped his journey to train for thirty long years with a group of Buddhist monks and martial artists. It was here that he earned the title "The Blue Nomad. (It was actually a joke, but he took it seriously.) Over those thirty years earned the yellow belt in Taijitsu, Jujitsu, and Karate. Finally he decided that he had learned all that he could ever know and must become a mentor to other up-and-coming superheroes. (The monks threw a party when he left.)

When The Blue Nomad returned to America (he got on the wrong boat and ended up in Gatorville instead of California) he found that many things had changed. After much searching, he found a superhero group who had heard of his many exploits (evidentally, there were a few people who thought he had saved them when he was "fighting crime" in America, and one of them had a friend in the patrol). And so, The Blue Nomad became a part of the Hero Patrol.

[B]Special Skills or Abilities (If any):[/B] The Blue Nomad rides a horse. That's about it. He also gives good (ridiculously terrible) advice. Oh! He also has the ability to eat really hot food. He once drank an entire bottle of Eddy's Brother's Secret Armenian Hot Sauce (insanely powerful)
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  • 2 weeks later...
Code Name / Call Sign:King Ultimate Killa

Gender (If Applicable): Male

Location: Suburbs of Gatorville, Florida

Age: 14, but 16 in 24 months time!

Personal Appearance : Tall, muscular and handsome with awesome hair and clothes. By which I mean 5'7", skinny with acne, dandruff and a cheap leather coat. He wears amulet in the shape of the Kanji for "Unstoppable Asassin", but his friend Jamie, who does Japanese 101, can't find in his dictionary (though it looks remarkably similiar to "gullible fool" to him). To defeat his enemies he carries a genuine $50 Ninja-to, with a wobbly blade to make it harder to block and a genuine blunt edge, as well as a significantly more expensive cellphone to talk loudly into at convinient moments.

Personality/Behavior: The Ultimate Killa fears no-one. As such he charges head-on in to situations as quickly as possible, then manouvers to either use stealth or cunning to defeat the foe. Typical schemes involve lying on the floor crying to lull the enemy in to a flase sense of security and crouching behind cover about to sneak up on the foe. Unfortunately, His schemes seem to be ready the moment after the situation has resolved. He is however a fan of, and dab hand at CS and Soul Calibur, although his PC does have a folder labelled "WallHax and Aimbots". Dislikes tidying, homework, satsumas, green food, cool people and doubters. So god forbid any villain combining those properties!!

Personal History: On his way home from school, Timmy Thompson bought an amulet from a mysterious hippy boutique, as well as cake which the crustiest hippy elder told him to eat in order to commune with the spirit of the amulet. It cost him half his allowance but that was a small price to pay for Ultimate Power! Even if it had cost him a whole month's allowance, he'd skill have got it.

After tidying his room and not doing his homework, he took out the amulet and ate the small cake and The Spirit of Awesomeness appeared before him. The Spirit of Awesomeness looked kinda awesome, sort of like Neo,Optimus Prime, Goku, a biker mouse from mars and Spiderman rolled in to one.
"What do you want" spake The Spirit of Awesomeness.
"I want to be ninja, I mean a pirate, a cowboy, a butler, a terrorist, a Super saiyan..... ballerina, monkey, goldfish........oooooooooooooooooooooohhh" replied Timmy, distracted by a burst of pretty colours.
"Granted" proclaimed The Spirit of Awesomeness and Timmy was filled with the cowherding skill of the ninja, stealth of the drunken pirate, the nautical knowledge of the cowboy, so on and so forth. Plus he could make a mean martini. It was about then that the dancing dogs appeared and the fairies played poker and after that it all got hazy.

Timmy didn't go to school the next day. Who needs school when you have Ultimate Power? Instead he went to town in an effort to dish out some justice and look totally sweet. Through a bizzare set of coincidence includung but not limited to a speeding truck, an escaped walrus and a faulty can of hair spray,the criminal mastermind Marmite McNab fell unconscious right in front of him, granting him "superhero" status on his records and an invitation to join Hero Patrol soon followed. Now Timmy mixes school and amatuer heroism, since the Hero Patrol command cannot allow truants to go uncaught, along with litterers and jaywalkers. He fights crime and villainy with his trademark self-confidence, right up to his seven o'clock curfew!

Special Skills or Abilities (If any):What isn't Ultimate Killa capable of? Who knows! However since it would be a rather long list I'll leave it to your imagination. He has several abilities that could be "special", including OCD about the arrangement of spoons and double jointed big toes.
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[B]Code Name / Call Sign:[/B] Super Absorbent

[B]Gender:[/B] ?

[B]Location:[/B] Gatorville, Florida.

[B]Age:[/B] ?

[B]Personal Appearance:[/B]

[B]Personality/Behavior:[/B] Remarkably headstrong, Super Absorbent is the first one into any fray, be it against super villains or women in line at the grocery store. Super Absorbent lets nothing get in the way of his duty of fighting crime. He is not deterred in the least by being hurled halfway across the city by a massive death ray, nor does he flinch from duty when thrown into a brick wall by a muscle-bound super villain. He is completely unshakeable in his resolve to fight crime.

Super Absorbent's wish is to contribute more to the team. True, he has often been literally thrown into the literal line of literal fire and has taken [I]8,974[/I] (and counting) for the team, he hasn't ever "taken down" a villain. He'd like to. A lot.

[B]Personal History:[/B] Super Absorbent was created by the Hero Patrol as a means of cutting down their extremely high casualty rate. His unpatented spandex-teflon-jello-sponge-fruitcake-polyester-cotton-titanium-kitchen sink-etc. composition was built to withstand anything that could feasibly be of harm to the Hero Patrol. The standard Hero Patrol tactic is to throw (or any other means of projection) Super Absorbent at an enemy as a distraction or counter so that the other Heroes can enact some unnecessarily elaborate plan of attack.

[B]Special Skills or Abilities:[/B] Impervious to physical/magical/energy-based damage, Super Absorbent can withstand [I]vast[/I] amounts of punishment from the best...err.....[I]worst[/I] of super villains.
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[COLOR=DarkOrchid][B]Code Name / Call Sign:[/B] Shorty

[B]Gender (If Applicable):[/B] Female (Last time Shorty checked, she thought she was a dude)

[B]Location:[/B] Newport

[B]Age:[/B] 20

[B]Personal Appearance (Images are acceptable): [/B]

[I]Height:[/I] 5?1

[I]Eyes:[/I] Honey

[I]Hair: [/I] Waist length raven hair with red highlights.

[I]Body: [/I] For being short Shorty?s skins is light tan with a pretty figure. Her ears are small and delicate as well as her hands. Shorty?s cheekbones are prominent with an average forehead and thin eyebrows. Her chin is has a nice shape and strong looking. She stands 5?0 and weighs about 120. Her lips are small and cutely curved. Her cheeks are red the majority of the time, she blushes whenever there?s a guy around (And trust me that?s 24/7). She does have short legs, which make it hard for her to jump and reach things.

Hairstyle: See attached image

Outfit: [URL=http://www006.upp.so-net.ne.jp/ochadokoro/g-chun-li.jpg]Oolala[/URL]

[B]Personality/Behavior:[/B] Shorty is short tempered and aggressive. She is like a fox when it comes to get her way (Especially with boys). She also has a short term memory and damn proud of it. She hates preppy people and being preppy kills her, but for a hot guy she?ll be the preppiest girl out there. Shorty dislikes girls who get in the way of a guy she wants, but knows how to deal with them. Also one last thing?she thinks she?ll drown in a puddle like her mother, therefore she hates rain.

[B]Personal History:[/B] Shorty grew up in a foster home in Newport, because her mother stared at her reflection in a puddle and tried to save herself, thus she drowned a heroic deaf?sadly she never got to save herself. Her father has short term memory, thus he forgot he had a daughter. One day at age 5, her father took her to the carnival and she went to use the bathroom. Shorty told her father to wait. When she came out, her father was nowhere to be found. So child services tried asking her who her dad was, but she couldn?t remember (She even forgot that she was abandoned in the Carnival. Foster care took her in and so she lived there.

As a foster child they gave her pills, saying that it?ll cure her forgetfulness (But it was a sugar pill?apparently short term memory wasn?t her case?its just all in her head.). They worked of course, except when she forgets to take them at times. Shorty was the ring leader of the foster home, causing headaches and chaos. The name of her group were, ?The Potty Patrol?. There uniforms consisted of trainer underpants (When they?re potting training), a hot pink tank top (The boys looked funny) and a baby bottle (Which they used as a weapon). She grew up kicking butt, but soon that ended.

She was adopted by a rich old hag. Shorty became spoiled and loved the finer things in life, most of all?the hotties. One thing though, she may have had a 38 D chest and a nice buttox, but she was short! She hated being short, because she can?t reach crap. But that?s what her hot guys were for...sex and slavery (They can reach for her in many ways -Wink wink-). Her profession is a martial artist instructor and only teaches hot guys. Since the owners found this out, they kicked her out (It was a disgrace to their clan) and now she's looking for something cool to do and Hero Patrol is it.But the better reason was for hidden revenge against those foolish [I]'Leggionares'[/I]. Now the first thing she wants to know is, "Are there any hot guys...and do I have to reach any objects higher than my hight?'.

[B]Special Skills or Abilities (If any):[/B]

[U]Chest Attack:[/U] This attack can be used against any guy and small chested females. The affect is horrible. For the males, they begin to drool uncontrollably and become hypnotized by them. In that moment she uses one of her martial arts attack (Kick in the balls). For the girls it causes extreme jealousy and defeat when she says, "CHEST!".

[U]Forget me not?:[/U] This attack is of the mind, this special technique only happens when she forgets to take her pills. The affect of this attack is?she just forgets she?s in a battle and walks off.

[U]Fox Power!:[/U] This is her specialty for hot guys. She acts like a fox to get them to be her next boyfriend (Poor guy).

[U]Secret Technique Blackmail Jitsu[/U]: Whenever she has dirt on someone, she uses it to get her way.[/COLOR]
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Code Name / Call Sign: [color=olive]Otakubot (Real name: Adam Jebrenski)[/color]

Gender (If Applicable): Male

Location: Gatorsville, Florida (born and raised)

Age: 15, but he?s way mature for his age. Waaay mature.

Personal Appearance :[u] [URL=http://img299.imageshack.us/my.php?image=otakubot3je.jpg]Behold![/URL] [/u]Few people have escaped Otakubot alive, and fewer still have captured his immortal face in a picture. This rare image displays the elusive hero. The man who took this picture is relearning how to speak.

Personality/Behavior: [color=olive]Because of his odd obsession of anything Anime, anyone close to Adam knows that he has adopted almost every cliché anime characteristic to date. He is fairly quiet and reserved, but all of this is vulnerable to change. At the drop of a pin, his mood will shift and Adam will be prepared with furious rage (ADHD). He often waits for his friends to start the fight and stand back ?powering up?. He doesn?t have any qualms letting his friends and allies take the fall, claiming his retributive rage increases his ?power level?. He is a man of many talents, talking for hours without blinking, and producing a 15 mL drop of sweat on the side of his forehead when embarrassed. Curiously, he is incapable of smiling without closing his eyes. Occasionally Adam peppers his monologues (Ah yes, he almost only speaks in monologues or in very succinct phrases, nothing in-between) with Japanese phrases like ?nani? or ?baka?. Unfortunately his dedication to the art of Anime has left little time free and poor Otakubot has a body odor worthy of his abilities list. Anyone who irritates Otakubot is subject to hours of taunting, and a stare that would make a shark?s eyes water. [/color]

Personal History: [color=blue]Adam discovered his powers outside his house on his porch, on one of those sweet Gatorsville nights. ?I was taking out the garbage early so I could catch Full Metal Alchemist and I noticed a piece of firewood had been left on a picnic table,? he commented in a rare interview, ?I focused my chi, and the log fell right off the table, no joke. I gotta powa.?

Before recognizing the quality of his new super condition, he would usually spend time homing his encyclopedic knowledge of anything Anime. He spent hours ?training? his skills to tapes of Naruto, Full Metal Alchemist, Cowboy Bebop, and the holy grail of all training tapes: Dragon Ball Z. Following his second year of training, he took it upon himself to share his knowledge with the world by heading an Otaku webring from his headquarters (basement). The following summer he carved a Kendo sword from a stick he found in the nearby woods. The forest echoed with the furiousness of his ?training?. One day, in the forest, Otakubot encountered a deer. He drew his sword and began to power up. The deer shat itself, out of [i]fear[/i] before fleeing in terror. "I was so close to sending him to the next dimension," he later remarked. Surely, Adam knew he was something special, no matter what his social studies teacher said.

He decided to join a group of likeminded heroes. Setting out on the dim night streets, sword in hand, he scoured the (sub)urban landscape for crime. Obviously, the inexperienced hero found nothing more than an occasional piece of litter, and a dog chained to a tree (of which Adam swears he will have his revenge). Finally, a member of his elaborate webring pointed him towards a group known as the ?Hero Patrol?. Taking up the call of duty, Adam knew Otakubot was ready. The only question is: are you ready for Otakubot? [/color]

Special Skills or Abilities (If any):[color=olive]
?Roundhouse? Kick- Despite claiming otherwise, Otakubot has never taken any martial arts. Anything he ?knows? is from episodes of Cowboy bebop or similar series. Because of his lack of his experience, his primary kick (a move where he flails wildly before turning his back to his opponent, jutting his leg out, and twisting back around to wobble his balance back) actually falls around a more ?belt buckle? altitude. This means that he inevitably kicks any of his opponents in the groin. Adam doesn?t know this, all he knows is that following this move his opponent is often crumpled to the ground [i]crying[/i].

CHARGE UP!- Before almost every engagement, Adam feels the need to power up. He braces himself and begins to scream, protruding as many neck veins as possible. For a solid five minutes or so, he screams- occasionally pausing to announce his newest (and legendary) ?power level?. Of course, this doesn?t really do anything to assist him.

Force Field- Otakubot has recently discovered that he has a permanent force-field surrounding his body. Melee attackers quickly realize this as soon as they close in for close combat. Actually, as described above, this is due to his abstaining from deodorant? or soap, for that matter.

Super ?Sayjin? Transformation- Otakubot?s second level of ?CHARGE UP!?. Upon the discovery of the Plasma of Destiny [/color]([URL=http://www.pricegrabber.com/search_getprod.php/masterid=1964704][COLOR=Navy]Paul Mitchell Hair Gel[/COLOR][/URL]),[color=olive] Otakubot realized his true potential. When unleashing this technique, he will often run wildly until finding a secluded spot. When his enemy least suspects it, Otakubot will step forward his hair in brilliant spikes, held up by pure chi. Currently, Otakubot has reached Sayjin level 2.

Kendo- Despite having no ?official? kendo training he still owns a ?blade?. At the slightest provocation, he will go to town on the nearest dead tree? beating it without mercy, as a display of power. [/color]
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Great work everyone. Sign ups are open for 12 more hours, and then the RPG launches.

[size=1][b]Code Name / Call Sign:[/b] Tiger Girl 3

[b]Gender (If Applicable):[/b] F

[b]Location:[/b] The darkest jungles of Africa / Gatorville, Florida

[b]Age:[/b] 24

[b]Personal History:[/b] The legacy of the name ?Tiger Girl? dates back to the earliest days of the Cold War when the United States government sent Catherine ?Kitty? Arbuckle into South America to hunt down and capture Nazi war criminals. With the aid of her pet tiger, Lily, Katherine donned a mask and leotard to dispense justice across several third world nations. Armed with nothing more than sheer fury, ?Tiger Girl? as she came to be known, bravely served her country for nearly two decades before she and Lily left active duty to write a popular social column in the New Yorker. Her current whereabouts are unknown.

In 1979 the second Tiger Girl, Tony Shere, donned a homemade replica of Tiger Girl?s original leotard to defend his neighborhood from the growing menace of the location homemowners association. His attempts were unsuccessful, and Tony was eventually forced to remove the broken car parts that literred his front lawn. Mr. Shere has since distanced himself from the life of a masked mystery man.

The origins of the current Tiger Girl, ?Tiger Girl 3,? remain shrouded in mystery. Some believe she is a disillusioned grad student who took the mantle after her boyfriend was mauled by a pack of wild tigers; others claim she is the reincarnation of a beloved Indian Princess, while most simply don?t care.

Tiger Girl 3 claims to be the child of famous zoologists who raised the young girl in the darkest jungles of Africa. At an early age her mother and father were brutally murdered before her eyes, possibly by ninjas, and the young girl found herself stranded in the jungle. Fortunately, she was eventually discovered by a family of friendly Bengal Tigers and over the course of the next decade traveled throughout Africa, hunting gazelle and learning the way of the tiger.

Wanting a better life for their adopted human daughter, Tiger Girl 3?s feline parents used much of their savings to send her to a two-year vocational college in Gatorville, Florida. She is currently enrolled. and hopes to learn TV/VCR repair, and other skills neccessary to live in ?Man?s World.? Joining Tiger Girl 3 in her journey is her sister, Tigara, a large female tiger who serves as bodyguard, advisor and housekeeper.

Seeking affordable housing for both her and her sister, Tiger Girl 3 and Tigara have taken up residence in Hero Patrol headquarters. Their dififculty in understanding the complex nature of ?Man?s World? is only made worse by the eccentric group of misfits she calls her ?Teammates.?

Many specific portions of Tiger Girl 3?s personal history seem inconsistent at times, most notably the fact that Bengal Tigers do not live in Africa. Those who begin to question her story often find themselves confused, and eventually choose to focus their attention on more fulfilling endeavors such as lawn bowling or discussing the posible existance of an all-powerful omnipotent deity who oversaw the creation of this reality.

[b]Personal Appearance (Images are acceptable):[/b] Tiger Girl 3 is a busty blonde beauty who insists on wearing a tiger-striped one-piece bathing suit at all times. Around the waistline of this swimsuit is a short "fir" skirt, with fishnet stockings covering her legs and extending down to her "fir" boots. Additionally, she wears a decorative headband, making it look like she has cat-like ears on top of her head, and has a homemade tail attached to her backside.

When fighting crime both she and Tigara wear a simple mask over their eyes to protect her secret identities.

[b]Personality/Behavior:[/b] Going against the negative stereotypes popular media have created for tigers, both Tiger Girl 3 and her tiger sister, Tigara, are especially calm and down-to-earth. Tiger Girl 3 credits this to a strong coserveative upbringing on the part of her ?parents,? a pair of wild Bengal tigers. Because of this she claims to find much of ?Man?s World? confusing and bizarre, believing that ?Tiger Society? is superior in every way. For someone who was allegedly raised by tigers, Tiger Girl 3 has an amazing vocabulary and language skills. This confuses most people she comes into contact with, and rightfully so.

She is often quiet, fickle, but nonetheless willing to charge into battle at a moments notice. She is fiercely devoted to her sense of justice, and loyal to those she believes are her allies.

[b]Special Skills or Abilities (If any):[/b] Tiger Girl 3 is currently attending a vocational school, where she hopes to master skills important to surviving in ?Man?s World,? such as TV/VCR repair and Bookkeeping.

Beyond that Tiger Girl 3 posesses the strength, speed and stamina of an average human woman who engages in moderate exercise. However, when in battle, she claims to be able to channel the ?Spirit of the Tiger,? enabling her to temporarily gain the ?Strength of a Tiger,? ?Speed of a Tiger,? ?Willpower of a Tiger,? or whatever other tiger-like attribute may seem appropriate at the time.

In addition, Tiger Girl 3 believes that she can communicate with tigers. Whether or not she actually can is open for debate, as Tigara mostly does whatever she wants around the house and rarely follows orders.

Other abilities, or supposed abilities have been known to make themselves known without logic or reason.

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[FONT=Fixedsys][COLOR=Blue][B]Code Name / Call Sign:[/B] Retro

[B]Gender (If Applicable):[/B] F

[B]Location:[/B] Gatorville, Florida

[B]Age:[/B] 30

[B]Personal Appearance (Images are acceptable):[/B] [URL=http://www.funkypair.com/ProductImages/COSTUME/83048.jpg][B]Retro[/B][/URL]

[B]Personality/Behavior:[/B] Retro is the typical hippy. Mellow, laid-back, and quirky, she's always a hoot-an-a-half, but she's always ready for a good "overthrow the government" sceme.

[B]Personal History:[/B] Retro, real name Carolyn Dawse, was born in Washington, DC during the seventies. When she was growing up, she was thrilled by the age she was born in, never wanting to leave it behind. Thus, her alter-ego was born, Retro! After high school, she traveled around in a Circus, being the only job she could keep due to her, well, unusuall clothing and "talents." The Circus eventually closed, leaving Retro stranded in a town called Gatorville in Florida. While there, trying to figure out what she was going to do with her life, she found a small group of "super heros," and decided that they, of all people, would understand her. From that day on (yesterday in the story once the story starts), she's spent her time as a member of Hero Patrol.

[B]Special Skills or Abilities (If any):[/B] Retro has "psycadelic" powers, albit a bit useless at times.

[B]Flower Power[/B] - Retro, just like magic, randomly brings up some flowers seemingly from nowhere...now, how this "power" helps in any battle, God only knows, but it sure is nice when you need to make a fresh, new flower necklace!

[B]The Power of Love[/B] - When surrounded by a group of evil villans - or a mob of 70's haters - she does a little dance to make them fall in love with her. Or so she thinks, as this "power" is nothing more than an illusion conjured by her mind.

[B]Smoky Haze[/B] - This is the only real power she has. When she gets out her "magic bag," smoke fills the air, making everyone...well, less themselves. You get the idea...[/COLOR][/FONT]
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[size=1][b]Code Name / Call Sign:[/b] The Banshee

[b]Gender (If Applicable):[/b] Female

[b]Location:[/b] Wherever the wind takes her (currently Gatorsville).

[b]Age:[/b] 21

[b]Personal Appearance (Images are acceptable):[/b] Unfortunately she is neither blonde nor busty but she makes up for that by instead dying her hair a ridiculously bright red. She has numerous scars on her limbs which she claims are permanent reminders of her horrible past (but are more likely reminders of how horribly clumsy she can be) and will always begin her elaborate tales of how they came to be whenever she thinks somebody is looking at them. She dresses just as elaborately, in lots of gaudy beads and colors, and is permanently on the look out for just the right pair of polka-dotted boots that will complete her ensemble.

[b]Personality/Behavior:[/b] The Banshee, also known as Bee within the Hero Patrol, has something of a flair for dramatics. No story or plan of action can be too wild or ridiculous and you can be sure that if there?s chaos somewhere, she?s in the middle of it (or will be very shortly). Bee is an attention whore and will throw a fit if she is not always in the spotlight. She often walks the streets in her super hero costume just so that people will follow and adore her. She loves to tell stories, most of which are just complex lies, and each time she opens her mouth her past life becomes a little more tragic.

[b]Personal History:[/b] Alice Whitford was born on June 4 to Isaac and Jeanne Whitford. She is the second child of three and if middle-child syndrome were ever to take physical form, it would be in her. Though her family was relatively well-off and the home life was easy going and affectionate, Alice found that she could not deal with the lack of attention and she began to feel repressed. She was a screamer as a baby and the habit only evolved as she grew older ? so much that the Whitfords had a personal account with the local window repairman and no longer bought glass dishes and such. She began to consider running away from home (this is also known as puberty) and after one particularly traumatic and oppressing day (her sister?s birthday), Alice decided that enough was enough and she ran away. She wandered back a few hours later because she was hungry but also enraged that the entire town wasn?t already out looking for her. After attempting to leave and failing many, many times, Alice eventually was successful in her schemes and left home for good when she was 16.

Over the years spent wandering from city to city, she has found that the more impressive and dramatic her lies are, the more attention she gets (as well as the more sympathy which almost always results in good food and a warm bed). Her relatively normal home life became a ?dark and tragic past? but the specificities of it can?t quite be pinned down. Alice will tell you that it was very painful, then sigh dramatically, and turn away so you can?t see the gentle flow of her anguished tears.

Her various quests on the road (and her ADHD) eventually brought her to [strike]Gainesville[/strike] Gatorville, Florida, where she stumbled upon a robbery in the making. One of the legionnares swooped in and took care of the bad guys very heroically and from that moment on Alice knew that she was destined to fight crime in a similarly valiant fashion.

Having cultivated the art of lying so well, by the time she found herself indoctrined into a lesser known but in her mind equally brave and glorious group of heroes known aptly as the Hero Patrol, Alice ? now The Banshee ? was starting to even believe herself. So much that her normal past life was merely a strange and unfortunate dream and that much of her life was, after all, steeped in tragedy. The exact tragedy of it varies, as she can never stick with one version for too long, but her sincere expressions of absolute suffering cannot be doubted.

[b]Special Skills or Abilities (If any):[/b] Bee lies very well, and can often enrapture people in her stories. Especially considering how tacky she is likely to be dressed, this often gives her other teammates time to get something heroic done.

She also screams louder and more shrilly than humanly possible, and many unfortunate souls have come too close to her during one of these tantrums and have suffered the consequences. Any glass within a fair radius of her during these screams will shatter, and some radio waves are interrupted and become static.

Bee is as clumsy as she is ridiculous, and with any kind of weapon in her hand, this can become deadly to all those around her. Her weapon of choice is a fork. She keeps a number of them in a shiny holster around her hips, and throws them with zeal without much concern for whether or not they actually hit her target.[/size]
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[font=trebuchet ms]Okay kids. Thanks to everyone who chose to sign-up. It is always an incredibly tough decision to decide who makes it in and who does not, but I chose a group of people I felt would work together best, and be able to keep the darn thing running. So without further ado, here we go?


Nomad Tical ? The Blue Nomad
Goddess ? Baby Punk
Dragon Warrior ? Raccoon Glory
Unborn Lord Xion ? Captain Death
Ben ? Super Absorbent
Drix D?Zanth ? OtakuBot
Arcadia -- Banshee
Shy ? Tiger Girl 3[/center][/b]

The RPG will begin as soon as I can get the thread up and running. Expect a PM shortly regarding how posting works.

Questions, comments and concerns can be PM'd to me, or posted in The Legionnaires Underground thread.[/font]
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