Sara

[size=1]I've lived in the same city mostly since I can remember. We moved to another part of town last fall. It's very strange for me to be out here. I'm used to walking down to the lake or zoo whenever I want, and listening to the Sunday evening concerts that they put on by the zoo during the summer. I'm a few miles away from all that now, and it's...curious. To be relatively close to everything, and still a hundred times further away.[/size]

[size=1]I don't know that I intentionally "hide" any aspect of myself particularly. There are some things that don't translate well to type, obviously, but... I tend to be nicer online than I really am. :toothy: And I use a lot less orange here than I do IRL. *is wearing orange tank top with orange plaid blouse tied around shoulders* Whether that means anything or not... :whoops:[/size]

[size=1]I've read the first one, and to be honest...I didn't much care for it. Two of my friends made a list of all the parallels between [i]Sword of Shannara[/i] and [i]The Hobbit/Lord of the Rings,[/i] though...that was pretty funny.[/size]

[size=1]Yeah, what he said. Heh. I admit, I was expecting haiku. Is pietous a word?[/size]

[size=1]I think it's a good idea to try and follow the rules of other kinds of poetry once in a while. Heh, right now I'm on a stint where I write almost nothing but limericks. Funny, quirky little verses. I find myself talking in them, too, without trying. Great fun. My friends've decided I've finally snapped. I don't mind haiku, but they always seem a little pompous to me. I've read/written (but I guess mine don't count) a few that are more casual, and they just sit better with me. [/size]

[size=1]I'm not really into haiku...They usually seem sort of sappy to me. I think people get so wrapped up in counting out their syllables that they miss a lot that could be done with their pieces. These are fine. I think for #1, the two five lines are good, but the middle one seems a bit forced, or out of place with the other two. The same thing for #2, only this time it's the last line that I don't care for. Not that they're bad, they just don't fit to me.[/size]

[size=1]Pulse rate...now, that would be really interesting. Have the dots going up and down in the actual pattern of a heartbeat, and then at the end, have it flatline..[/size]

[size=1]I'm sorry. Cancer's a pretty awful thing. Artistically, you convey the feelings that come with it very well.[/size]

[size=1]Good job. That's very..well, I'm not sure what the word is, but it's very that, I assure you. ^_~ It might be easier to take if you broke it up...there are some likely places. Nice.[/size]

[size=1]It's an okay story, but i thin it would be more effective told a different way..maybe by some guy who lives in the town. The narration seems really pompous at times, and that takes away from it.[/size]

[size=1]There are a few spelling/typing errors. Run it through MS Word spellcheck, it'll catch most of that stuff. It's not bad. The [i]Look into my eyes you cannot, Peer into my soul you canot do. [/i] Bit seems a bit off. Makes me think of Yoda..none of the rest of the poem is worded like that. Hope things work out okay.[/size]

[size=1]I like the last one the best. The first one I also like, but the text keeps covering up the face, heh.[/size]

[size=1]The green surprised me, too. Your pieces usually only have one color. As usual, I think there's too much going on...but that's just me. I seem to like simple things. I actually like this the best of all your stuff that I've seen.[/size]

[size=1]Ooh, I like this one. I don't know what to call the background, but it reminds me of the sponge painting I used to do when I was little. (I should try that again, heh...) Anyway, it's spiffy. The symbol fits perfectly, and it took me a minute of staring, but the word "Scorpio" is in the background, too. Nice. I was going to complain about the pixel lines at the side, but I actually kinda like those, too. (That's a first...) *offers you a blue smiley sticker*[/size]

[size=1]I like the sloopy blue stuff, but it should be lighter around Yugi's face. Or maybe have something else with cool colors--the dark magician, maybe--underneathe the blue, and Yugi on top, somewhere else.[/size]

[size=1]I really like this. The dark red is the perfect color for it, and I love the effect. Like she's made of crystal or some sort of glass.[/size]

[size=1]Lost and Found, heh. My youth group goes to their concerts every so often. Can't keep them clear with other groups, but I definitely recognize the name. My favorite group is The Newsboys.[/size]

[size=1]That's sweet. I really like the first two/last two lines. So wistful.[/size]

[size=1]I like this. It's very neat--the different ways, and everything. I really like it. The last one doesn't fit with all the others, though. Maybe find another way to word it.[/size]

[size=1]The coloring--I spent about three minutes coloring in photoshop. Mostly just because I figured any picture of Mimi had to have [i]some[/i] pink. ^_~ I actually like the coloring of the one in the bottom corner. Airbrush is fun, heh...even when messy. Yeah, her arms/hands are a bit messed up. They looked fine in the sketch, but I didn't really want to deal with overlapping arms and how they'd be folded when I shaded it --heh. The ratings...I give people smiley stickers instead of numbers or anything like that. So my "ratings" poll has smiley stickers as choices, mostly. Pick one, heh.[/size]

[size=1]It looks squished. Eh...[/size]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Mitch [/i] [size=1][font=century gothic][color=gray]What it comes down to is emotions are what control us so much. Hope is just another motion of emotion and control. [b]It's holding onto something to give life some meaning. [/b][/size][/font][/color] [/QUOTE] [SIZE=1]Mitch, that's it exactly. If I didn't have hope, I would have killed myself about thirty times over this week. I've got no qualms about dying. What keeps me from actually doing it? Hope that tomorrow will be better. Hope that I'll be able to talk to my friends tonight, hope that I'll get a letter the next afternoon, hope that there'll still be orange popsicles left in the freezer when I get home from school. Hope that my friend won't be sick tomorrow, hope that I'll be able to talk to my crush during school. Hope is being able to look beyond how rotten life can be, and see something pleasant. Expecting that something else is coming. And if it isn't? Well, then you move on and hope for the next thing. Hope isn't [i]believing[/i] anything. I guess it's almost more wish-fulfilment than anything else. You don't have to declare that you know you're getting an A in Chem, you just have to think, "Heh, that would be nice." And maybe worth living through. Glory, Mitch--I honestly don't know why you haven't just killed yourself. I wouldn't be able to live without looking forward to what may be next. [i]Any[/i] kind of emotion is "just something to give meaning to life." Pick one.[/SIZE]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Heaven's Cloud [/i] [B][color=indigo]they will be fired from there job.[/color] [/B][/QUOTE] [SIZE=1]Heh. Something else that bugs me is people's using internet slang IRL. I head someone saying O-M-G in the hallway this morning, and nearly fell over.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=1]The colors aren't quite as vibrant as they are in photoshop, but I don't feel like editing it right now. This is a page out of my sketchbook that I scanned and played with a bit. Experimenting with coloring styles, I guess. They're all pretty sloppy, heh. ^_^[/SIZE]

[size=1]*absently ponders how Shy managed to post, in April, a column he hadn't written yet* As a whole, I love it. You are a good writer, heh. ^_^ Taadaa, Sara-Editing ahead: [b]Community service and recycling do not make a difference; these are merely quick-fix solutions to problems will continue on forever.[/b] I'd word this differently. You don't really want to concede that they are "solutions," and "continue on forever" is sort of redundant and weakens what you are saying. [b]That is why I have thought of a creative way to deal with all of the problems: ignore them.[/b] I'd try to find a way to make this part stronger, too. "That is why..." sort of needs to lean on something, and you don't want that. MNaybe something perky: [i]Happily, I have found a way to deal..[/i]. [b]It is not one where the latest episode of ?The Simpsons? is not a letdown,[/b] You've got two "nots" in there, and it takes a sec to figure out what you mean by it. Maybe "lives up to expectations," instead. [b]or where disease and world-hunger are just a bad memory from a bygone era.[/b] I'd throw another "a world" in there. [i]...or a world where disease...[/i] "Just a bad memory" should probably be "just bad memories." Or maybe, as long as you're redoing that "Merely quick-fix" from earlier, you could use "Merely bad memories" or "Simply bad memories." [b]Happiness is the only truth in this world, not integrity or honesty, like so many others would like people to believe.[/b] Good idea, but I'd find a different way to do it. This could have a good impact, but it sort of rambles. Maybe [i]There is only one truth in this world. It is not integrity or honesty, as some would have you believe. It is happiness.[/i] Or something like that. Break it up a little,and maybe save the "Happiness" part for last...building up to it a tad. I'd add another complaint to the Dixie Chicks and muppets bit. Use semi colons, not clauses held together with conjunctions. People expect three examples, you should give it to them. [b]Things would be better if I lived [/b] I'd change this to [i]My life would be better..[/i] Things would be the same, after all. And it sort leaves a slightly confused... "Things? What things?" mentality. [b]I want to live a happy life, and hearing about other?s problems would only upset me.[/b] Again, I'd cut it so one of those stands a bit stronger on it's own. [i]I want to live a happy life, free from the burdens that are others' problems[/i].